Tasteless Humor II The Second One.

Discussion in 'Humor & Satire' started by Moi621, Feb 21, 2019.

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  1. Liberty Monkey

    Liberty Monkey Well-Known Member

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  2. Liberty Monkey

    Liberty Monkey Well-Known Member

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    That's Meta777, Gatewood wishes he could wear it that well.
     
  3. Nonnie

    Nonnie Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    How do you start the Teddy Bear Olympics?
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    Ready, Teddy, Go
     
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  4. Sallyally

    Sallyally Well-Known Member Donor

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  5. Gatewood

    Gatewood Well-Known Member

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  6. Gatewood

    Gatewood Well-Known Member

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  7. Gatewood

    Gatewood Well-Known Member

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    [​IMG]
     
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  8. Liberty Monkey

    Liberty Monkey Well-Known Member

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    Keep Britain Tidy
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    Picnic in France
     
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  9. Liberty Monkey

    Liberty Monkey Well-Known Member

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    period.jpg
     
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  10. Liberty Monkey

    Liberty Monkey Well-Known Member

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  11. Moi621

    Moi621 Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    Beto O'Roarke
    The Theon Grayjoy of
    Democratic Candidates.
    2020
     
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  12. Sallyally

    Sallyally Well-Known Member Donor

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    Can you elaborate?
     
  13. Moi621

    Moi621 Well-Known Member Past Donor

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  14. Blaster3

    Blaster3 Well-Known Member

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    sex is as psychological as it is physical and as with all things, humans find a way to screw it all up... the price for being able to 'think'
     
  15. Sallyally

    Sallyally Well-Known Member Donor

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    Once upon a time, there was a prince who, through no fault of his own...

    ... was cast under a spell by an evil witch. The curse was that the prince could speak only one word each year. However, he could save up the words so that if he did not speak for a whole year, the following year he was allowed to speak two words. (This was before the time of letter writing or sign language.)

    One day, he met a beautiful princess (ruby lips, golden hair, sapphire eyes) and fell madly in love with her. With the greatest difficulty, he refrained from speaking for 2 whole years so that he could look at her and say, "My darling." But at the end of these 2 years, he wished to tell her that he loved her. So he waited 3 more years without speaking, bringing the total number of silent years to 5.

    At the end of these 5 years, he realized that he had to ask her to marry him. So he waited another 4 years without speaking.

    Finally, as the 9th year of silence ended, his joy knew no bounds. Leading the lovely princess to the most secluded and romantic place in that beautiful royal garden, the prince heaped a hundred red roses on her lap, knelt before her, and taking her hand in his, said, "My darling, I love you! Will you marry me?"

    And the princess tucked a strand of golden hair behind her dainty ear, opened her sapphire eyes in wonder, and parting her ruby lips, said, "Pardon?"
     
  16. Sallyally

    Sallyally Well-Known Member Donor

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  17. Liberty Monkey

    Liberty Monkey Well-Known Member

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  18. Liberty Monkey

    Liberty Monkey Well-Known Member

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    So Hilldawg is opening a production company
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    It's going to make murder mysteries
     
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  19. Gatewood

    Gatewood Well-Known Member

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    Except that there will be no mystery to them.
     
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  20. Liberty Monkey

    Liberty Monkey Well-Known Member

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    Real men drink yards not pints
     
  21. StillBlue

    StillBlue Well-Known Member

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    True story. I'm tending bar on mom's day weekend on campus. On Dad's day the whole family comes down but on Mom's you know she was telling dad the program was the flower show, a musical and the fashion show. He suddenly needs to get the lawnmower ready and "have a nice time with our daughter at school, give her a hug for me". The mom's get to town and no one is at the flower show, the musical loses money and the fashion show flops because all the mom's are partying like it's spring break.
    One girl brought in her mom to join the mug club where you traditionally chug the first mug. I rang the bell to announce a new member joining and the crowd didn't even get a chance to cheer her on because she just poured it down without drinking and held the empty aloft. The crowd went nuts and her daughter could only get out a shocked "MOM!". Mother's answer, "I went to college too you know." They were probably doing bongs later.
     
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  22. StillBlue

    StillBlue Well-Known Member

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    It should also be noted that a significant portion of the bathroom wall was devoted to signees of "I bagged a mom".
     
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  23. Blaster3

    Blaster3 Well-Known Member

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    tea baggin should be an olympic sport
     
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  24. StillBlue

    StillBlue Well-Known Member

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    Hmmmm, women's tea bagging would be done how exactly?
     
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  25. Blaster3

    Blaster3 Well-Known Member

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    do you really need ask :rolleyes: there's an identity crisis infecting (ahem, effecting) the planet
     
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