Perhaps someone here understands what is going on - maybe one of the ladies can explain? Julie and I have been going together for over six months - we get on really well (she comes from a similar background,) we have lots in common, even similar sociological views, and we do loads of stuff together. But now an issue, which I had no way of foreseeing has raised its head. My aunt has a neighbour up in the mountains, and I know her slightly (she was very kind to me when I first arrived in Oz). This lady has recently bought a computer, but knows nothing about them, so I regularly help her out with it. Like I set up the operating system, installed all the software, and got her on the internet. I also help her out with things like chopping and stacking wood, and sometimes drive her to places (her old car is not always reliable). She and Julie have met, and we all three sometimes go to places for Devonshire Tea and things like that. They seem to get on OK. But Julie now says this lady (who at 40, is older than my mum!) constantly 'flirts' (whatever that is supposed to mean) with me, and is only making excuses to see me alone in her house. I think my GF is actually jealous of this middle aged lady!!! Can anyone here work that out? She wants me to stop going over to this lady's place, except when she or someone else is with me. I spend my weekends up at my aunt's place and this lady is her next door neighbour and friend - how can I do that without offending her? Like she has asked me to go over for afternoon tea tomorrow, and Julie has refused to go with me (but my aunt will be there). This lady used to be a fashion model back in Germany, and is in terrific shape for a woman her age - but really, she could get anyone, why would she be interested in someone like me? I think Julie is just being paranoid - does anyone agree?
Your GF is probably right. If you want to get some experience in how to do the dirty deed, keep going over to "fix" her computer, and she'll be kind enough to "fix" your pipe. Don't doubt me.
Leo, women can sense it if another woman is hitting up on their guy..us men are idiots and don't see it..my advice is tell the 40 year old woman that your gf doesn't want you to see her anymore and leave it at that..tell your gf that she's got to trust you..if she don't there's going to be problems ahead.. or you could tell your gf why not do a threesome..lol..
Maybe she just likes narcissistic emo type boys. Have you shared you writings on PF with her. I suspect you may have. Seriously dude, you are obviously intelligent and articulate. That I admire and appreciate in anyone, but you need to grow up and cut the bloviating crap.
I'm going to walk away from this computer before I say something so inappropriate. I'm going out for beers so Ill be back later. lol
Maybe this will help: http://womensissues.about.com/od/startingover/f/FAQCougar.htm Question: What is a cougar? The short answer: A cougar is an older woman who is primarily attracted to and has sex with with significantly younger men. Answer: The most commonly-accepted definition of a cougar is a woman 40 years of age or older who exclusively pursues very young men. The onset of the cougar years is hotly debated. Some feel that a cougar can be as young as 35, but women of this age would not be viewed as cougars unless their sexual conquests were no older than 25; the ten-year age difference seems to be an unspoken but accepted minimum between partners. Typically, cougars prey upon men almost young enough to be their sons. Thus fortysomething cougars would be attracted to men in their 20s, and fiftysomething cougars would pursue men in their 30s and so on. Some cougars are less interested in a relationship than a sexual conquest, perhaps enjoying the fact that they are physically appealing to men who are considered to be in the prime of their virility. A cougar may be married or unmarried, and some even go after their daughters' boyfriends. Although the term 'cougar' comes from the big-game predatory cat of the same name, the cougar connection also may allude to the wearing of animal print clothing by older and more sexually aggressive women. An early example of the cougar phenomenom was seen in the groundbreaking film The Graduate, in which middle-aged Mrs. Robinson (Ann Bancroft) seduces fresh-out-of-college Benjamin Braddock (Dustin Hoffman). Real-life cougar relationships include Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher (15 years), Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins (12 years), and Barbara Hershey and Naveen Andrews (21 years). Your gf obviously feels that your former-model weekender is a threat. Is there more that you aren't telling us or are you just a bit naive?
If your girl friend is uncomfortable and you want to keep the relationship with her, then this "in top shape" 40 year old (which isn't THAT old by the way) should not be your priority. Keep the peace.
The last time I saw your age, you were around 18? Assuming your Julie is also. Believe me, that's a natural instinct us women have.... most anyway. we can spot a woman like that a mile away - their body language screams volumes and the guy doesn't have a clue of what she's doing - he just sucks up the attention and b/f he knows it, he took the bait..... The woman could very well be a cougar and likes them real young.... Here's a few wake-up signs for you to look for. Does the woman talk more to you than Julie? Does she touch you a lot while talking & smiling at you - you know, your hand, arm, m/b ruffle your hair, etc? Often stand close to you? If she does even these 3, listen to your girlfriend..... if you want to keep her.
Without examples of how she "flirts" with you, no one can say anything. I'm partial to assuming your girlfriend is overly sensitive and doesn't trust you. On the other hand, that other chick my want your package. With the last line, it sounds like your girlfriend is threatened by the older woman. She may not even be flirting with you, but your girl will make a big deal out of everything about it. Get rid of them both and enjoy life. In all seriousness, if it upsets your girl that much, just stop helping the other chick out. Show her what Google is and she can figure it out from there.
Probably because individual people are very different. What is applicable advice for one woman does not work with another. Similarly, nobody understands men either.
Oh pleassssse, coming in here, first day back, being all philosophical and chit! lol, jk, jk Happy belated B'day!
You know me, all philosophical-like. Actually, that is nothing like me and I want to kick my own ass right now. Thanks for the belated birthday wishes. One more year closer to death...
I think Leo is gentleman enough to head for the door before he gets into trouble. It could also be that his girlfriend is very possessive and any spare time should be spent with her. If I were the gf..I would be worried more about a girl of Leo's age rather than a possible mother figure..
First lesson. Women are always right, even when they aren't. So this guy is walking along the beach and stumbles on a lantern. Picks it up and rubs it. Out pops a Genie and says, "I will give you one wish". So the guy thinks about it and says he has never been to Hawaii but is afraid to fly so could the Genie build him a highway to Hawaii. The Genie looks concerned and starts making excuses. The ocean is so deep, the geological plates shift, etc, basically saying it is impossible so asks the guy for a different wish. The guy thinks about it and States, "Well, I would like to understand women so make me understand women." The Genie replies, "Would you like two lanes or four?"
Leo is naive - he's 19 or m/b 20 now. Still has a lot to learn about women and you gave him some good info about a certain type of women....
Older women are generally attracted to younger men in the US, many pretty teachers have engaged in relations unethically with them. This lady an ex fashion model from Germany seems like a once in a lifetime opportunity for a young lad. Julie is correct but what she does not know will not hurt her and as Eminem a very famous and well respected man in the US says 'opportunity only comes but once in a lifetime' so its best to take advantage of them when one is young and handsome than to wait until one becomes old and could not attain such fine aged wine as this woman appears to be without large sums of money. This is a great deal she sounds high class and very expensive so don't pass on this free coupon she is giving as it could become a regrettable moment later when one looks back on their life
My guess is your GF senses that you are overly obliging towards this woman and jumping from that to the conclusion that she's trying to seduce you.
The issue can be more complex than you may think. For starters, if your girlfriend was "regularly" helping out a man in his 40's that looked like Brad Pitt, would you have no problem with that? Perception can be a dangerous thing. Perhaps your gf is the jealous type. Perhaps she has a good reason to be jealous and you are not telling us everything... who knows. Perhaps your view of flirty and your gf views are different. Here is a rule that I follow. I am very careful when spending time alone with a woman other than my wife or a family member. I have had women who say that they are not jealous get very jealous because of a female friend I had before the relationship started. Men and women think very differently. Comfort her and let her know that you love her... assuage her insecurity with reassurance. And most importantly... listen to her... no... I mean really listen. I know, not very macho stuff, but macho only goes so far with a woman.
If your about 18... and that women is seriously hot... you should definantly go for it... A hot older woman will knock the water off your wet ears... plus.. your like 18 right?.. do you think that the girl your seeing now is THE one?
Congratulations. It's been a long time since I've seen anyone give such extravagantly idiotic advice.
Hey, thanks for all the advice - I appreciate it, and I shouldn't really have asked about something so personal. And please get this 'cougar' thing out of your minds. Mrs M is not like that, and she would be horrified to learn that anyone thinks that of her. I am sorry if I gave anyone the wrong impression. The problem really is that I cannot understand why Julie suspects her of 'flirting' - like I said, I don't even know in what manner she is supposed to be coming on to me. She is an old friend of 3 years' standing, and lives by herself - all her family are in Germany, and she is probably happy to have a bit of company from time to time. Honestly, she has nephews older than me, and she addresses me as 'Mein Jungen'. There is no way she would think of me in that way. I will try to find a way of explaining this to Julie, and thanks for your input.
What is the meaning of the German word mein junge? English words for the German word mein junge son http://www.wordhippo.com/what-is/the-meaning-of/german-word-mein_junge.html oh sorry hearing she was an ex german fashion model it sent off a false alarm, julie is probably thinking like us so just explain how she addresses you that should help.
AFIK, Mein Junge can mean 'my son', but it is more commonly used for 'my boy' or 'my child'. It is just an affectionate form of greeting, and as she knows I speak a very little German, she probably considers it appropriate and motherly.
