Is my cat ruining my marriage?

My cat has been with me for years and she moved in with us when we got married. But now that a baby is coming in a few months' time, he wanted me to give up on the cat for the many reasons (health, financial, hygiene, etc) which I don't think is much of a problem. We have been arguing about it and there are days he would not talk to me. Is he just making the baby an excuse? Should I give in to his request?

It's just really hard to let go of someone who had been with you for years. Skipper is not just my pet, she's my friend and my family. How can I make him understand that?

 

If your having a baby, ditch the cat.

 

No one should ever be asked to give up a cat. And there is no reason to.

I think you need to get rid of the hubby-to-be. This guy is psycho.

You made 2 mistakes.

1 - you got hooked on a psycho.

2 - you got pregnant from a psycho.

If you really want to clean house and start over, get rid of the guy and abort his kid.

The poor kitty is not safe as long as this azzhole is around. And neither are you.

 

Having pets around is actually beneficial to newborns so keep the cat. Tell you husband to stop being ****ing lazy and do a quick 5 second Google search.

 

Dump the dude. His love for you is somewhere around 5 inches. His request is unreasonable and he will be controlling you like this the rest of your life.

 

You can look up litter box dangers while preggers on the net. They are real but not common.

 

I grew up with cats from a baby I'd say teach the kid not to eat **** and you'll be fine.

Tell him to get f*cked.

 

Someone once posted somewhere else that her husband gave her an ultimatum. Get rid of her dog or he was out of there. She posted a pic of her and the dog happily living in the house with him out of there.

Frankly, any man that told me to get rid of my pet would find his stuff on the front porch. Period. He knew you loved that cat when he married you. It would be like you telling him the baby will be coming soon so he can't drink beer any more, have poker parties with his pals, get rid of his beloved truck, etc.
But that's me. You should do as you feel best, but it WILL maybe put a damper on your marriage because what else will he demand later on?

 

A baby and a cat can be good friends. I think he or she will grow up to be a better person when a cat is around. Getting rid of the cat is the worst choice to be made.

 

Like I said..it would be a cold day in hell before I let ANYONE demand I get rid of my furkid. Nope nope and double nope.

 

If your spouse is demanding you ditch your pet, unless your child is allergic, Id ditch him and not the cat. See which he likes more the cat or making monthly support payments.

 

Thanks for the advice. I really love my cat and not willing to give her up. I'll wait 'til the baby is born if he's not allergic to cat, then I'll keep my Skipper. Regarding my marriage, a friend told me to consult ReGain. She said they have informative tips on how to deal with problems like this. And yes, you're right, I already have my cat when he decided to marry me, so he has to live up with it.
My cat has always been my family and you don't just leave a family behind.

 

Red flag warning right there.

 

It would be easier for me to leave a human behind than a cat behind.

 

!

 

I agree with a lot that has been said. But I wouldn't be so confrontational. Tell him you love your cat like she's your child or best friend. If he loves you he wouldn't be insisting you give up something you love so much. And if you did you would always resent him for it. Is that what he wants?

Some people just don't seem to be able to bond with animals. He may have no concept of how you feel about her and can't relate to those feelings.

 

Whether he can relate is not the issue. He refuses to speak to her because she has declined in getting rid of the cat he KNEW she loved when he married her, and now wants to bully her with silence until she complies.
Personally, I think he is a jerk and if anyone needs to be dumped, its him.

 

This suggests a problem on his end...

...and this suggests a problem on yours.

In a battle of wills there is no winner, and in a marriage the biggest loser is the children. With that in mind, here's a course of action you may want to consider, if and only if it squares with your own insight: resolve to find the cat another home before the child is born, and tell him you've done so. Between then and the time you're able to place the cat, if you give him space, he may find himself embarrassed by the graciousness of your concession and relent; but if not, go ahead and keep your word ungrudgingly, after which the cat will be as happy as a cat can be, and all you'll have lost is the feeling of being loved by an animal.

 

Again, he may not be able to understand the bond people have with animals. I'm not saying he isn't a jerk. I don't know. But I have met people who literally have no concept of how much animals can mean to us animal lovers. He may think this is entirely a battle of wills and nothing more.

There are also hormonal considerations. His instincts to protect the child could be overwhelming his ability to empathize.

Disclosure: I made excuses for my highly abusive wife for two decades. So what do I know?

 

This is absolutely the worst post I have seen on this forum. Break up a nuclear family over a cat?

 

Ditch the cat. I know that sounds harsh but nothing will go septic much faster than a cat scratch or bite. I wouldn’t consider bringing a newborn into a house with a cat. Once your kid is 4-5 years old, get another cat if you want. But just think, finishes burying its poop and hops into the bassinet with your brand new baby. F-no.

 

Are you capable of bonding with an animal? Have you ever loved your pet? Have you ever loved a cat?

I play with my cats and get scratched all the time, and have for well over 40 years. I knowingly allow them to get a little too rough and incite them to do so. And I've never had a scratch go septic. And I never worry about antiseptics either.

 

Again, it is not about his inability of animal pets as furkids and how people can truly love those furkids. What the bigger picture is...he is bullying her with the silent treatment. After she gets rid of the cat (which I hope she does not) what else will he bully her about? Her friends? Her parents? Her siblings? Her job? It starts small. The more she appeases him after his temper tantrum of silence, the more he will do later on. Its a given. This guy KNEW about her cat ande how she felt about it. He does even now, because the cat is still there even with his sulky silent treatment. How far will he go? Will the cat just up and disappear? (More likely killed and buried in a field while he plays innocent). The point is...the most IMPORTANT point is deeper than not having a concept. The point is...he wants to begin controlling. Whether she puts a whoa on it and kicks his ass to the curb is up to her.

Been there, done that. I know.

 

Does the cat still have its front claws? If so, I see a problem. Otherwise, all you would have to do is secure the litter box from the child - and extra care how you handle litter.

However, it also seems like the marriage is destined to real problems and not likely to last long. IF what you are saying is accurate (we are not hearing his side), he's a control freak and it is going to get worse - much worse.

 

The cat poises little danger to the child if no front claws. It is a control freak thing he is doing. She's the one going thru the hell of pregnancy and upcoming labor, not him.

If she gives up the cat she'll never forgive him and his pouty silent treatment act will get worse and worse and worse. In short, she has a REAL problem.