I used to do something similar. Whenever I got angry at work I would remind myself that whatever ticked me off would be done and gone HISTORY as soon as it happened and that in the scheme of things I would have a hard time remembering the triggering problem a few days later. Taking the longer perspective usually did the trick for me. Too bad that the lockdown destroyed the business. Now it is . . . history.
Excuse me, I was drunk posting....I really only hate those who express hate for me. I dont "like" many but I dont hate them. Hate takes energy I dont have.
I'll never get past missing my dog, the dreams were so real. I love our "chewy" but he will never replace Spike. I welded Spike a steel, cross from rebar with an epitaph I engraved in steel plate. I had it powder coated Chewy is half blue heeler and half chiwawa.
Renewed my learners permit today. I'm 40, never had license, I take the driving test on Dec 4th Eye test was surprinsingly hard, I had to squint one eye. Evidently I passed it.
My heart will be broken till the the day I join him in death. I will remember him always. RIP LIL booga.....Miss you.
I don't blame you for that. Sometimes, I hope however that in a few years that you would feel happiness as you think to Spike. I hope that to me also, If I die, even in an early tragic manner, that the people that I love and who love me would after sadness, remember me with joy as the good memories would be stronger than the sadness of the loss. My great grandmother was like that, I didn't knew her, but every time I see my grandmother or the grand children of that grand mother speak of her, they always have a smile and end to laugh, because that woman I didn't knew could be very cheerful, and she remained associated to that joy to people who knew her, such a way that decades after her death she continued to bring joy in her family, and even if I was born after her death, in a manner I can feel the cheerfullness of her, that's amazing. Good luck.
sux to lose your pal but anger is a natural emotion, like so many other natural emotions we have. we live in a state where emotions are demonized then we wonder why we are producing so many psychopaths. Anger, Hate, Love, Empathy all exist in real people, its not having those emotions that is the problem its what people do with them. The pain of your loss will fade with time, hang in there.
I know your pain. When I had to put my old granny cat (17yrs) to rest I held her in my lap while the drug was administered. I unashamedly cried as hard for that cat as I did for my own mother when she passed. Someone said it best concerning companion animals "They give so much, and ask for so little in return.". The heart will heal, the memories will remain.
Cognitive Behaviour Therapy is all about this. If you can't change the facts, change how you view them, and you can find peace and serenity.
I had the same experience. It still haunts me sometimes. I had to put my 17 year old dog down, and I held him as he was injected with a lethal injection. It has always haunted me since that I made this decision, even though I know it was the right call (he was no longer able to walk or see and was in pain).
Spike was only ten, a tumor grew in his sinuses and eventually emerged, eating thru the bone and forming a large lump. He was having severe nosebleeds when he sneezed, I thought the last one would kill him, he bled so much. It was obvious it was time, as much as I hated to make the call.
I'm sorry for your loss. Heartbreak is the pet owner's burden. Such short lifespans, we are almost guaranteed to have to bury our beloved cat and dogs. Take solace from the fact you gave Spike the best life you could. Your pain makes it clear you loved him with all your heart. You could do no more.
While I can never replace Spike, "Chewy" is fast growing on me, a strange mix of blue healer and chiwawa.....Now, if we would only teeth and stop biting everything (including us!)
I'm glad you were there, as much as it must have hurt. Being with a pack member makes all the difference in their quality of life at the end.
I've heard some people wait in the lobby, I can't see how anyone could do that. I took him home in a cardboard box and dug his grave. I layed next to him on the blanket I buried him in and said my goodbye. He has a welded, rebar cross with an engraved epitaph plate.