My Second Life and other Secrets

No, we saw each other for three years. That ended two years ago. She just contacted me again and wants to renew our friendship. She drifted away for a time but apparently feels comfortable continuing as friends now.

I have a new sugar baby now. But this time I found someone open to more. Number One never wanted to get as close we did. She felt very conflicted because she knew she was going to break my heart. It was supposed to be more like FWB but I drug her into a romance kicking an screaming. And she did grow to love me but not in the way I might have hoped. But sure enough, after two years and about 500 women [online discussions followed by about 115 coffee dates, and 12 short-term sbs], I found someone very special. And this time we are both falling in love.

There were moments that Number One did fall in love with me. But as soon as it started happening, she would pull back.

 

Nope, it is a fascinating story. And the hit rate on the thread proves it. It is also somewhat cathartic for me. It's not like I can talk about this with many people. And most people have a very skewed perception what it's like. What really motivated me to start posting years ago was reading what people said about escorts and sbs. It was so distorted and dark compared to the real world that I couldn't stand it. Someone had to tell the real story.

I have also had quite a few men thank me. It is an inspirational story and I have even been credited with possibly saving a few lives. I've been telling my story for five years as it progressed. But my personal demise and comeback is what many men can strongly relate to. As I said, I believe three have now said I might have prevented their suicides. They were well on their way.

I have two friends, one in particular, who have been pounding on me for years to write a book. The one knows about almost everything and has been my biggest supporter. He was there the day after I almost committed suicide. So he saw the darkest of the dark as well as the highest highs.

It has been an amazing ride! And all after I thought my life was long over.

 

She loved me...eventually. I was in love with her. There is nothing mercenary about that. Love is love. And it was the most powerful experience of my life. I swear to god, the first time I looked deeply into her eyes, I had what I have to call an out of body experience. From that moment I lost control of my life completely. It was the most amazing and profound experience I have ever had.

You have touched on one of my themes: You can find true love this way. It happens. But you have to approach it with reckless abandon and without expectations. It is a complex philosophy but it works for me. So I decided to make that my goal. And it looks like it worked. I can now safely say that my beautiful new sugar baby is now my girlfriend. And we are both falling in love. We have already crossed the line. This is no longer a pure sb/sd relationship by any stretch.

PS. I don't mean to try to tell other people what love is. I can only tell my story and share what I've learned. I didn't know love like I felt with Number One even existed. I really didn't believe it. I was engaged twice, married for over 25 years, and fell in love several times before that. This experience was completely new to me. It made all that came before seem like an afterthought.

...and it was worth the price of a broken heart to love her with all my heart. I am a much better person for having love her so deeply.

 

Today I heard this cheesy old love song that struck right at the core for me.



I've loved love songs ever since I met Number One. Before that, they were just songs.

 

When Number One contacted me again, I began to feel my love for her. But I am now falling in love with someone else. Suddenly I found myself overwhelmed with feelings for two women. I've never been in love with two women before.

I couldn't help but think that the heart is an amazing organ. It has the capacity for infinite love. You never run out of room for more.

 

Please post where I talk about my sexual escapades. Out of 19 pages, how many links can you post?

What I have talked about is almost entirely the relationships. Now if you want graphic details of my sexual escapades, you had better get some popcorn sit down.

 

You mean I should get my barf bag?

 

I was raised in an abusive home. It wasn't horrible but bad enough. For the most part we were always close but my mother was overbearing and abusive. She often treated my father like crap. So are my sisters [in their own ways]. So were the other women in the my family that were a big part of my life. I loved them all but facts are facts. So i married a raging btch. It was only when I left my wife and started talking with other women online that I started to understand how bad I had it. I honestly didn't know that this wasn't normal. My life seemed like what I had always known.

 

And... there was this bit of logic. If I am going to get seriously involved with someone, she has to be way out of my league. I haven't dated anyone who isn't far too young and beautiful for me, for five years - most are half my age or even less. When I met Number One she was 21.

I know that once women have a chance to get to know me, in some cases I might have a real shot. So why not date sugar babies while looking for true love. That way, they have a chance to get to know me. And if I find true love, which I may have, it will be with the woman of my dreams, which may be. My new gf leaves me spellbound. She is just who I hoped to find.

It is a twist on what mothers used to tell their daughters: It is just as easy to marry a rich man as a poor man.

Well, I found it is just as easy to date women way too young and beautiful for me, as women who are in my league.

Coffee dates cost me about $15-20 each... to meet women who would never otherwise give me the time of day. But you have to be fearless.

 

When Number One came over for the last time, we talked about what we had learned. First and foremost she said our relationship had cured her of ageism. She no longer viewed older men the same. She saw me as a man, not an older man.

In retrospect, I realized that I was cured of ageism as well. If I am to start over, why not reach for the stars?

I will no longer hold these women's youth and beauty against them.

 

No thanks. I don't do Roman.

Bad joke. It's a crazy world out there.

 

Man. You sure do have a lot of feelings.

 

HWGA, you seem like a decent person, and I'm glad you find moments of happiness, but I think you can do better.

I think you need to look inward, and your womanizing is a form of procrastination.

I think someone that has dozens of relationships might have difficulty with emotional intimacy, and a healthy relationship.

The novelty of sex wears off quickly, no matter how young and hot your next woman is, and then you will go back into circulation, like it seems you are doing. Wouldn't you rather stop the cycle? I think the only way you can stop it is to figure out why you think it's a good strategy to try and build an emotionally satisfying relationship with 21 year old hotties that just want your money. Until you sort this out, I think your happiness will always turn out to be just shadows on a wall.

 

That's why I married up the social ladder. The only arguments I have with my wife about money is her parents constantly giving it to us.

 

LOL! I'm a hopeless romantic. Some of the women really like that.

 

I've never been happier. I loved number one more than life itself. I didn't know it was possible to be so happy. But it is amazing how many people try to tell me I'm not. You asked if I post for approval? LOL! Most people just want to tell me what's wrong with me.

The fact is, you are entirely missing the point. I found the greatest love of my life this way and I've been looking for another. With a little luck, I might have found her. We are getting closer and closer all the time and I am falling in love with her. I fall a little harder each time I see her. And she responds in kind. We have a very loving relationship that is filled with passion.

You think the novelty of sex wears off? Try going ten years without it. Then talk to me about novelty. Sex gave me the will to live again. And having a healthy sex life is a key marker for happiness in general. Psychologists talk about this all the time.

Sex shouldn't be a big deal. And it isn't when you have a healthy sex life. Go without like I did and it becomes a VERY BIG DEAL!

 

I've been working on arranging our threesome. My gf has always wanted to have sex with another woman and wants to do a threesome. So I finally contacted a young lady I've seen before. She is willing if the chemistry is good, and wants to meet for drinks. So I officially have a date with two women. If the women like each other we will all go back to my place.

It was funny. Hot women really don't like being told how hot they are. They hear it all the time. But when I told my friend that my gf thinks she's hot, she liked that! She even blushed a bit. And when I told my gf that my friend thinks she's hot, she really liked it! It is said that women really dress for other women. I guess this was a twist on that.

My gf gets all hot and bothered when we talk about it LOL! The other day she told me that she may be about 15% lesbian... I'm not sure how she came up with 15% but okay.

If this goes well we may make it a bit of a regular thing. I've always said, "Whatever the lady wants!". Darn the luck!

Honestly, I can take it or leave it. I've done a couple of threesomes before. It was fun but not something I was dying to do again. I'm perfectly happy with my gf. But she is still exploring and wants me to be a part of that. So why not? It wasn't high on my list of things to do again but I'm not about to complain.

 

Dude, pls. Sadly I could only stomach six pages, but literally on every page you were sharing details about your made up sex life with Miss Universe and threesomes with Miss California and Miss Nevanda or whever your pathetic excuse for a thread is about.

Okay, here we go:

Spoiler

Get rekt, bi-ch!

 

Good on you.

I went to Dunkin Donuts today get a cup of coffee, and the girl working the register was easily a 9, but probably a 10. I could tell she liked me because she said I could have the coffee for free if I would let her give me a BJ. My GF, who was with me at the time, said she didn't have a problem with it as long as I banged her and her twin sister when we got home, so I was like "Ok." LOL you always find love when you least expect it. HA!!! I can't believe the same thing happened at Walmart the day before when I was buying "Emeril Essence" seasoning. I never cry myself to sleep anymore, now that my soul has been filled with true love.

You guys out there listen to me and do what I do, and you will never be sad or lonely. Always wear just a Speedo. Love is a rare and precious thing, so don't let it get away!!

 

That was very funny! I would watch out for that "Essence of Emeril" though. Do you really want Essence of Emeril in your food?

 

This thread would make a superb rap track tbh.

 

Ok, guys...and gals. I did it. I cracked the code!

This thread is a tribute to Akon. The opening post is a reference to Lonely which - mind you - also was Akon's first hit. Then we go into I wanna love you and finnish off with Smack that. I am sure there is some Don't matter in here as well.

I haven't bothered reading the whole thread to find other similarities and references, but to me this is way too obvious to not be what he is trying to do.

(If you do not know the songs, you can look them up. I won't bother linking them because I hate Akon).

Herewegoagain is pulling some heavy Zodiac killer-esque Keyser Söze sh*t on us all.

 

My mistake. I started to take you seriously at first.

Big news: Open relationships are common with young people. Many don't believe in marriage or even necessarily monogamy.

 

You gotta be happy with yourself, by yourself. Until you find that, no one else will fulfill you. Once you do find it, no one can take it away.