Question for the married folks

Discussion in 'Member Casual Chat' started by WAN, Jul 19, 2017.

  1. J.Idallian

    J.Idallian Well-Known Member

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    It's a teenage perspective to be able to drop a deuce in front of your s/o without feeling embarrassed about it? Man I don't know if I can disagree with this harder.

    If I'm with someone, I want it to be a "ride or die, no secrets" sort of arrangement. The type where you could come home and say "Oops, I accidentally hit a biker on the way home" and their first response is "Where are we hiding the body?"

    To me that says more about the closeness of a relationship than anything else. Maybe I just value honesty too much.
     
  2. yabberefugee

    yabberefugee Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    That is very likely. I have known friends longer than my wife. It's not the same. I didn't pledge a lifetime commitment to them, and when you do that and work through your conflicts because of that commitment, there are rewards you don't experience in casual relationships. I heard it said, and i believe, "love is a commitment".....that opposed to "we'll try it and see if it works out."
    You and I can point to "marriages" that fail rather quickly. They never experienced what I'm talking about.
     
  3. yabberefugee

    yabberefugee Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    You are right. You don't need my permission to do anything you want. I have known couples in their 70's and 80's that have been married to the same spouse since they were 18. All I'm saying is....you don't have nearly what they have!
     
  4. crank

    crank Well-Known Member

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    It's a teenage thing to think there can never be too much 'togetherness'. It's honeymoon stage stuff. Reality dictates that the togetherness as expressed in the honeymoon stage does not work over many decades. It strips all mystery and individuality from the two humans who are trying to retain the spark of 'otherness' over a lifetime. Anyone who's been married or bonded for more than a couple of decades knows this.

    We should all have a few secrets. I would absolutely hate it if my husband shared his every last thought with me. I'd probably kill him. And I'm fairly sure he'd be less than thrilled to know my every passing thought. Mystery is very important to romance.

    Nothing at ALL to do with honesty. We're not talking about dangerous secrets, we're talking about ordinary day-to-day human stuff. That's the stuff best left unsaid and unseen.
     
  5. crank

    crank Well-Known Member

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    Many of whom probably started married life in single beds, 1950's style. There's a lot to be said for separate bedrooms/beds. In fact I suspect that separate bedrooms might be the most likely to promote long term romantic mystery and allure. You're forever 'dating', while still sharing the practicalities of life. I like it :)
     
  6. yabberefugee

    yabberefugee Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    I have heard in rare instances, snoring can be a problem!
     
  7. crank

    crank Well-Known Member

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    Dunno, we're not snorers at my house. Well, not unless really really tired :p

    I understand that many had separate beds in the 50's because they didn't want the kiddies seeing them all bundled up together under the covers. Silly reason of course, but it probably worked for them in terms of marital longevity.
     
  8. WAN

    WAN Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    Please try to keep things civil.
     
  9. Stuart Wolfe

    Stuart Wolfe Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    I have seen my wife floss, and she's seen me do so as well, but it's actually kind of rare. I usually leave for work while she's still asleep, so while I have no real issue with her seeing me - and she has no issue with me seeing her floss - we mostly miss that part of each other's lives.
     
  10. yabberefugee

    yabberefugee Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    When I first met my wife, we saved flossing until the third date. I did not want to appear cheap in any way. There was a level of commitment.
     
    Last edited: Jul 21, 2017
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  11. perdidochas

    perdidochas Well-Known Member

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    There was nothing uncivil about it, just being realistic. When you have kids, you get exposed to most bodily fluids, and as the parent, it's your job to clean it up.
     
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  12. ArmySoldier

    ArmySoldier Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    True. It's why I'm not ready to be a parent.
     
  13. ChrisL

    ChrisL Well-Known Member

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    Everyone says and thinks that, but it's different when it's your own child. The most important thing is that your child is comfortable and clean. :D Besides, they become potty trained eventually.
     
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  14. ChrisL

    ChrisL Well-Known Member

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    Really? I think the teenage perspective is being ashamed of your human bodily functions. Lol. :D
     
  15. ArmySoldier

    ArmySoldier Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    That's true as well. I can always wear gloves
     
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  16. J.Idallian

    J.Idallian Well-Known Member

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    That's a funny way of spelling Haz-Mat Suit.
     
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  17. Wrathful_Buddha

    Wrathful_Buddha Well-Known Member

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    I think all of that stuff depends on the individual.

    When I find a woman that can burp the alphabet without stopping, I will marry her.
     
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  18. rcfoolinca288

    rcfoolinca288 Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    Flossing is ok. I stop at doing number 1 and number 2 though. That calls for a closed door.
     
  19. Ritter

    Ritter Well-Known Member

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    Ugh. I hate little babies. They are so small, vurnable and apathetic. They are kind of scary too. They are so much cooler around age 5-10 and then, when puberty kicks in, they start to suck again. :p
     
    Last edited: Jul 25, 2017
  20. ChrisL

    ChrisL Well-Known Member

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    I love babies. At age 5-10, they can talk and they do . . . a lot. :D Babies are sweet and love you. Just the way they look at you melts your heart, especially when they flash you a cute little baby smile and make cute little baby sounds. You are right about the teen years though. You still love them of course, but they aren't as cute anymore and most teens are PITAs because that is just the phase in life they are going through. Takes a LOT of patience to parent a teen.
     
  21. ChrisL

    ChrisL Well-Known Member

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    That's why I don't have any patience anymore! I used it all with my son! :laughing:
     
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  22. Ritter

    Ritter Well-Known Member

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    Sounds lovely. :)

    I do not know what it is, but babies scare the heck out of me. :laughing:

    Let'em marry at 13, just like in the good ol' days. :p
     
  23. ChrisL

    ChrisL Well-Known Member

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    Noooooo. That would be a terrible idea. Lol. Teenagers tend to make really BAD decisions and tend to be quite irresponsible too. They are still kids and still learning about life, sometimes through trial and tribulation but let's not take it to extremes now!

    Ha ha! You are afraid of little babies. :D

     
  24. Ritter

    Ritter Well-Known Member

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    Burping the alphabet is how 2nd graders pick up girls. Not anything you would want from a lady imo.
     
  25. ChrisL

    ChrisL Well-Known Member

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    During lunch break at my old job, my friends and I would sit there and chug soda and have burping contests. :laughing: Not something I would do at a restaurant or anything though.
     

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