Sex & Love Around the World

Discussion in 'Member Casual Chat' started by HereWeGoAgain, Mar 18, 2018.

  1. Thingamabob

    Thingamabob Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    Yes, I understand.
    I’ve never been to a strip club in my life. For me it’s like what someone said about those Japanese sex dolls ….. “CREEPY”.
    Sounds nasty but I can relate on two levels. A friend of mine met a girl from another high school and the two of them arranged that we should “double date”, me with her friend. We were young and sex was still not yet within our realm of experience. So we “parked”, me in the back seat with her friend. As soon as I got to smootchin’ with her a hell of a stink went up. Me and my friend talked about it later because he could smell it in the front seat too. We joked about it being “my date” getting hot, but what did we know? Now, of course, I realize that is exactly what it was.

    As far as call girls go (Ooops! I mean “escorts”) I’ve never had the experience. However, I was 19 when I was sent to Vietnam. Scared & lonely ….. you take it from there. During the war EVERYTHING served as a brothel. I walked passed a Vietnamese laundry shack one day in Phu Hiep. A girl (who had more duties than washing clothes) took one look at me and ran outside and grabbed my arm. What a strange experience! I ended up being “together” with her for several weeks (until I marched off into the interior of the Central Highlands) but I never paid her one piastre. She didn’t want a cent from me. Still today I don’t understand what that was all about. I have a photo of her and I together in Tuy Hoa but it’s probably not a good idea to post it.
     
  2. Moonglow

    Moonglow Well-Known Member

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    I use that excuse also..
     
  3. Thingamabob

    Thingamabob Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    ... that you are a pregnant robot?
     
  4. HereWeGoAgain

    HereWeGoAgain Banned

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    i've had a sugar baby for going on six years now. It is more a kept woman type of thing. I have also spent a great deal of time and worked hard to finding meaningful relationships. It can be whatever you want it to be. That is the beauty of it.

    I only saw escorts for about six months. But I must say, it was nothing like I expected. I really expected to feel horrible about it afterwards. Every stereotype in the book was running through my head. But I wanted to get laid again before I died. When the first night was over, it was just the opposite of what I expected. It was a wonderful experience. In part I was lucky because not all escorts are nice. But they were absolutely wonderful and we had a blast. They came back the next night as well.

    In the end, all the bs you've heard or seen or read is meaningless. There are nice escort and others who are not nice. At the high end it is just an arrangement between consenting adults. It is like anything else. You really aren't a john and an escort. Those are just labels. The reality is that you are two real people with feelings and needs being intimate. It is strange in a way. There is [can be] an honesty about it all that you don't get in regular relationships. You are both there for a reason so there is no pretense about that. At the same time, you have a lot in common - as evidenced by the fact that you're both there. It requires a lot of common ground and a bit of daring to end up in bed together in the first place. And it is a relationship turned upside down. You have sex and then get to know each other. But sex is a fantastic ice breaker. Everything is on the table after that. I have had wonderfully intimate conversations with women I'd known for a couple of hours. In fact, that was probably the most amazing part. I never knew I could jump in bed with a total stranger and have a great time. But after going so long without, I began to appreciate sex on another level. I had gained a deep appreciation for the need for touch, and intimacy, and passion. You don't have to be in love to share those things. Two people giving each other pleasure... there is nothing wrong about that at all. Suddenly it all seemed perfectly natural and normal.

    In the sugar baby world, it can be anything from what amounts to hiring an escort, to a real girlfriend. The Relationships cover a broad spectrum, Sometimes people even get married. Generally it is more like friends with benefits on steroids. I look for that special connection - great personal and sexual chemistry, intellectual compatibility - that takes things to the next level.
     
    Last edited: Mar 22, 2018
  5. HereWeGoAgain

    HereWeGoAgain Banned

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    At first, only one escort came. We took off our clothes and got into bed. At that point I felt I should explain that I hadn't had sex in over ten years. So I wasn't sure how I would perform. She was shocked! She couldn't imagine going that long and never cheating. So I gave her a brief history of my story [not about the near suicide though]. She then rolled over and looked me in the eyes with great compassion and asked, "What is your wildest fantasy?" That really took me back! I wasn't ready for a question like that!!! I thought for a moment and said, "Do you have a friend?" I sure do! she exclaimed. And the rest is history.

    But I was most struck by her compassion. I couldn't remember the last time someone thought about my needs.
     
    Last edited: Mar 22, 2018
  6. Thingamabob

    Thingamabob Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    I’ve only had 3 experiences and I am not eager to do it again. The first time was with a sex object who wanted to do my friend as well, so we did. But with him along for the ride I couldn’t do it. Failure. The second time it was with a German girl I met in Cyprus. She was travelling with a friend and after a couple of days we ended up in the sack all 3 of us. No problem. Then many years later it was another girl I dated who wanted this other guy to join us. Failure. I realized it was having another man in bed that put me off but that two woman was OK. But the fact is that I am a romantic and 3-somes are not for me.
    Definitely true.

    But now I think this subject is finished. It is getting too personal and I don’t to go there.
     
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  7. HereWeGoAgain

    HereWeGoAgain Banned

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    I strongly suspect that if more men did talk about it, fewer would be shooting themselves in the head. And in that light...

    Amanpour was in New Delhi, India, this week. A number of things jumped off the page for me. For one, India is evolving sexually. Porn is huge; and huge with young women, as in Japan and the US now. In fact, two young women she interviewed say that many women learn about sex and their own sexuality, from porn. [Interestingly, Howard Stern said pretty much the same thing].

    Something else was that transgender and "other" sexual identities to include eunuchs, have been recognized since antiquity - they are mentioned in the Kama Sutra [600 BC] and are now known as Hijra. So, again we see that the notion of sexual diversity being something modern, is false. It has always been around. They even have a temple dedicated to the Hijra, with sexual displays on the Temple walls.

    Like Japan, India has a rich sexual history that was stifled by Western influences - in this case rule by England. So we are two for two with hints of a theme, that the spread of Victorian morality, and Western religions, created sexual repression everywhere they appeared. I find this especially interesting because I long ago decided that they have taken a huge toll on the sexual health of the average American as well.

    For example, sex a huge part of life; in fact, it is the driving force of life itself. It is a big part of what we are. But people are often uncomfortable talking about it. How silly it is that parents are often uncomfortable talking to their children about sex?! Consider the absurdity of that! Why would they feel uncomfortable? Obviously the answer is guilt; guilt resulting from the unhealthy sexual repression created by religion and Victorian morality. People aren't comfortable with their own sexuality.

    I will never forget the sex talk I had with my dad. I was about 11 or 12. We were talking about something electrical. He commented that the plug is called male, and the receptacle is called female. Do I know why? he asked. Yes, I replied. Okay. And that was my sex talk with dad.
     
    Last edited: Mar 27, 2018
  8. HereWeGoAgain

    HereWeGoAgain Banned

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    This week Amanpour was in Beirut.

    While highly conservative now, Islam wasn't always that way. There are old Islamic religious texts that addressed the subjects of sex and God all in one book, which is unheard of today. In fact, it was said that God exists in the penis and vagina - something that even the most liberated Muslim finds difficult to repeat today, even in private. But that's how it was. Islam taught that the joy of sex has a place in life. There was also an Islamic instruction manual on how to please your partner, for both men and women, with illustrations for the unacquainted. But in order to consolidate power, Islamic leaders over the last couple of centuries constantly drove Islam towards conservatism. It was purely political but the effects were additive. So now we have a highly repressed population that can barely speak of sex, but where the most googled word is "sex".

    Hymen repairs are done in secret so as to make a woman a virgin again, so to speak. If you don't have a hymen, you aren't going to get married or have a life. And for the majority of women, those who do retain their virginity, they are often essentially traumatized by a life of sexual protectionism. All their lives women are taught to protect their hymen at all costs. So don't let a man touch you! When the time comes to get married, they find it difficult to adjust. They have a hard time giving up what they have spent a lifetime protecting. One woman interviewed who is soon to be married, doesn't want her new husband to touch her at all. She doesn't want to lose her hymen. She has been protecting it her entire life! It requires therapy to urge them into sex. And if they marry and don't put out, the husband can divorce her without even showing up in court, at which point she is a marked woman.

    At the same time, while highly conservative in public, their private lives are often much different. One woman claimed that her Christian friends are more conservative than her Muslim family. So it seems to be a society caught in a paradox. They don't buy into the highly conservative views of their religion. There is a sense of sexual liberation. But they don't dare act accordingly in public.

    Apparently gay men sometimes marry gay women so they can each have their homosexual lovers; who are also married to gay men and women. They have children and put on a front so they appear to be happy families. But it is all a ruse so they can live a homosexual lifestyle in secret.

    The police had anal probes they would use on men to determine if they have had anal sex. If the probe fit, they were guilty. It seems that has mostly gone out of practice but still exists.

    Wow.
     
    Last edited: Apr 1, 2018
  9. Guess Who

    Guess Who Well-Known Member

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    :D
     
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  10. HereWeGoAgain

    HereWeGoAgain Banned

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    Heh, what are you smiling about?
     
  11. Guess Who

    Guess Who Well-Known Member

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    I was smiling at Fenton Lums post.
    I got lots of work to do helping hubby get the pen ready for pullets. Was 2 now after a trip to Tractor Supply it is 7. Back to peeps again. Never say never.
    Snake ate 2 of the others so we replaced them plus 3. Have to keep thee peeps separated from pullets for a few weeks, fun,fun,fun.
     
  12. HereWeGoAgain

    HereWeGoAgain Banned

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    Ah! Having people on ignore can get confusing sometimes.
     
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  13. Guess Who

    Guess Who Well-Known Member

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    Oh ok . I use to put people on ignore but then I'd come back and read their post before i signed in. So I guess I'm too nosey to use it.:whisper::)
     
  14. Guess Who

    Guess Who Well-Known Member

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    Love is like seasons some are hot some are cold and some are somewhere in between.
    Sex alone will not keep love alive. A couple old sayings on some kitchen towels and wall plaques come to mind.
    " Kissing don't last,cooking do ".
    " Quickest way to a mans heart is through his stomach."
    Of course without passion nothing works for long. But these are just saying that there is more than just a hot time in bed to be a good. But no man or woman wants a cold cod for a partner. And a man later in life sometimes has to fall back on memory for her to be desirable. A woman has to be patient and in many cases forgiving.
    This is what I have found in the study of lasting relationships over the years.
    What do you think?




     
    Last edited: Apr 19, 2018
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  15. HereWeGoAgain

    HereWeGoAgain Banned

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    Going all the way back to my days on the HS football team, where I played ball with a fair number of black players, I've known that black guys don't generally like going down on their women. They used to give us white guys a bad time about it. "I can't believe you put your face down there! DAMN!!!" :D I was so amused by their shock. That was the first thing I went for the first time I got a chance. But everyone knew, literally in locker-room talk, that the brothers don't eat at the Y.

    I was never sure if this was a localized cultural phenomenon or true of blacks in general. Sure enough, this is true of at least some black cultures. Amanpour found it to be so and even included scenes from a stage play in Ghana, where a wife is challenging her husband on the subject. She wants it! But he keeps insisting that's a Western thing and black men don't do that!

    So now we know why so many black women are seeking relationships with white men. :D

    I dated a young black woman for a time. Just as pretty as can be! No doubt about it, she was having new experiences. I remember her saying at one point that she couldn't believe the things I'm doing down there! Not that she was asking me to stop...
     
    Last edited: Apr 24, 2018
  16. Space_Time

    Space_Time Well-Known Member

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    Here's more:

     
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  17. HereWeGoAgain

    HereWeGoAgain Banned

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    I saw that Berlin was coming up. I wondered if Amanpour would find what seems to be common knowledge to those in the know: Germans are heavily into kink! Sure enough, the opening scene was about BDSM. Amanpour even allowed a guy to tie her up... a little. LOL!

    I had a young lady request that I use ropes to tie her up. Truly, it was her idea, not mine. A bit of reading reveals that restraints can cause injuries if not done properly. You can even do permanent nerve damage. So before playing, one should learn the basic safety techniques. Beyond that, many people who are heavily into bondage see it as an art form.

    So I asked a woman I know who is also into kink, where I should go to learn the basics. She gave me a number of links to You Tube videos that teach the basic knots and safety. What was striking was that upon review, a majority of the how-to bondage videos are made by women, not men. And many of the top "experts" online are women.

    I always thought I was kinky. Not even close!!! I'm damn near vanilla compared to people who are truly into the kink scene. But a little play is fun from time to time.
     
    Last edited: May 6, 2018
  18. HereWeGoAgain

    HereWeGoAgain Banned

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    When Netflix first got big, I spent some time going through Independent and foreign films. I found some real treasures in there! But I also found some very strange movies; perhaps the strangest being an Independent Chinese film. It was raw, harsh, highly sexual, and dark. I remember scenes with young men discussing how many blow jobs they'd given that day for money, along with occasional graphic details of some encounter. I remember thinking WOW!!! Is this really what its like in the big cities, in China? I had never seen such a dark portrayal.

    But there was another very strange element in the movie - some kind of symbolism involving watermelons. They REALLY seem to have a thing for watermelons. They were being used as sexual symbols, with scenes involving melons and sex. For example, there was one scene where you can see a woman lying with her legs spread. Her lover is apparently working her hard with his fingers... but as the camera pulls back, you see he is jabbing his fingers into a half a watermelon between her legs. That's what's making all the squishing sounds. WHAT THE...?!?!?

    This was seemingly a rare view into the darkest regions of the Chinese culture. But I was never able to put it into perspective. I don't understand the symbolism. Clearly there was a lot going right over my head.
     
    Last edited: May 6, 2018
  19. Sahba*

    Sahba* Well-Known Member

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    Great thread, except perhaps for the middle aged, male basket cases, lol. I'm thrilled with the openness about sexuality we have at this point in the US & despite being a 'dichotomously polar - social conservative' (extrapolate what U will) in many ways, I think that we should embrace a little bit of northern & western European openness about sexuality and the human body.

    I tend to think that bikini tops are more titillating focal points for men than 'O-natural'; I think that coed living and even restrooms is probably not a bad thing in some circumstance, that was something that my undergrad institution experimented with (lol - SoCal). I think that there are way too many frustrated guys out there that don't have much success w/ getting laid & an 'on the up & up' financial transaction between consenting adults makes perfect sense. That's all the superficial stuff that first comes to mind but definitely an interesting thread with room for thought... The love portion is the complicated part & probably the ol' timers have the most insight on that, lol.
     
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  20. HereWeGoAgain

    HereWeGoAgain Banned

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    More titillating than tits? :D

    I now believe there are many kinds of love. I've always separated something like the love of a pet, or a child, or a sibling, from romantic love. But "loving" a partner can mean many things. It took me twenty years to realize that my ex wife and I had entirely different concepts of what it means to love someone.

    I also now believe in love at first sight. I experienced that with my first sugar baby and it was the most powerful experience of my life. That's why she ended up being my sugar baby. People say it isn't "real", but life doesn't get any more real than that. It's a good thing she was a good person. There was a time I would have done ANYTHING for her. I was completely helpless. It was amazing! And I still love her six years later.
     
    Last edited: Feb 9, 2019
  21. Chester_Murphy

    Chester_Murphy Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    You don't foresee a market for the backseat driver card being designed by intel?
     
  22. Sahba*

    Sahba* Well-Known Member

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    Moonglow said:
    {Quote: "As long as the women have no vice box it should be nice..." Quote}

    Y'all don't think that we don't say the same thing about the majority of U guys out there; Millenial & younger... My goodness, If you don't take my word for the majority of 'space cadets' out there being guys, just look at the college, grad school & high paying job #'s. More & more, the roles have been reversed & the hot guys are being kept around, despite their feeble minds, for our pleasure!
     
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  23. Sahba*

    Sahba* Well-Known Member

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    There are some real chauvinist (A-double snake's) on this thread but U're not one of them 'HWGA'; You're quite a sweetie actually, lol
    U do realize, I hope, how many young women in life & reading this thread come away with this vision. :)

     
  24. Chester_Murphy

    Chester_Murphy Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    I always think of this one incident I went through some years back. I was driving my then wife somewhere she wanted to go. She was telling me how to get there. She told me to turn left at the next intersection. As I turned, she shouted, "No! Left, left"!

    I looked over briefly and she was looking out the right side of the car and saying, "left".

    lmao

    I pulled over asap and "we" got our **** together before we continued.

    I agree with you, though. I just love picking on yinz. ;)
     
  25. HereWeGoAgain

    HereWeGoAgain Banned

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    I'm at about 15% body fat. And over the last six years I've added a lot of muscle. ;)

    I was down to 13% and shooting for an Olympic level of 10%, but I injured my shoulder lifting too heavy and had to back off.

    When I was seeing my first sugar baby, I was still losing the last of the weight. I call her Number One online. I was CRAZY CRAZY CRAZY in love with her.

    When I would lift weights, I stopped counting and instead used her as my motivation. My counts went like this as I did reps - Number One, Number One, Number One, Number One...

    I kid you not! LOL!
     
    Last edited: Feb 11, 2019

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