Tasteless Humor

The anchor has a wide head. The suspect has a narrow head. The rapist is older or appears to be older, thinner, has a wider chin, a more pronounced nose or even bulbous nose, and his eyes are closer together.

So what was your point?

 

Barry rings his new

girlfriend's door bell, with a big bunch

of flowers. She opens the door, sees the flowers,

and drags him in. She lies back on the couch,

pulls her skirt up, rips her knickers

off and says 'This is for the flowers!'

'Don't be silly,' says Barry,

'You must have a vase somewhere!'

 

The turkeys are looking good this year!

 

That you're a racist without a sense of humor.

Why are redneck murder cases the hardest to solve? Because all the DNA matches and there are no dental records.

What is the scariest thing about a white person in prison? You know he did it.

What do you call it when a white man dancing has a seizure? An improvement.

 

How do you arrive at that inane conclusion?

 

When I was a boy, I had a disease that required me to eat dirt three times a day in order to survive... It's a good thing my older brother told me about it.

 

The GOP is arguing for a change to the plaque at the Statue of Liberty. It should read:

Give me your tired, your poor, your little girls...

 

What do you get when you cross a bunny and a Rottweiler?
-
Just the Rottweiler.


<bada boom tsss>


​

 

I hope when I inevitably choke to death on gummy bears people just say I was killed by bears and leave it at that.

 

I hope that when I die of a heart attack during wild sex, they write on my headstone that he went with a smile!

 

I hope that when I die of a heart attack during wild sex, they write on my headstone that he came before he went.

 

What do you get when you cross a pig with Nancy Pelosi?

Nothing, there are some things even pigs won't do.

 

My dad died when we couldn't remember his blood type. As he died, he kept insisting for us to "be positive," but it's hard without him.

 

I had a friend whose mother, when frustrated, would say to her son, "You know, I thought about having an abortion with you. And I'm still thinking about it!"

 

Three blokes were working on a high rise building project, Macca, Chook and Simmo. Chook falls off and is killed instantly. As the ambulance takes the body away, Simmo says,"Someone should go and tell his wife." Macca says, "OK, I`m pretty good at that sensitive stuff, I'll do it."
Two hours later, Macca comes back carrying a slab of VB. Simmo says,"Where did you get that, Macca?"
"Chook's missus gave it to me." "That's unbelievable, you told the lady her husband was dead and she
gave you beer?" Macca says, "Well not exactly. When she answered the door, I said to her, "You must be Chook`s widow."
She said, "No, I'm not a widow."
And I said, "Wanna bet me a slab"
(A slab is 24 cans of beer. VB is Victoria Bitter, a popular brand of beer)

 

Veterinarians all over the country are being fired or sued. They are always asking to see women's poossies.

 

Anna Navarro, a CNN Republican pundit who hates trump, now calls the GOP, the Grand Old Perverts!

 

^ awfully tasteless - lol

 

Based on the historic effects of aging on Presidents, perhaps the best way to get rid of trump was to elect him!

His performance yesterday was suggestive of a stroke patient.

I wouldn't be surprised if we saw him keel over with a Big Mac in hand.

Making graveyards great again!

 

Did you know Santa is a pimp?

Why do you think he's always calling for his Hoes?

 

A Qld farmer got in his ute and drove to a neighbouring farm and knocked at the farmhouse door.
A young boy, about nine, opened the door.
'Is your Dad home'? the farmer asked.
'Sorry mate, he isn't' the boy replied. 'He went into town.'
'Well,' said the farmer, 'Is your mum here'?
'No, sir, she's not here either. She went into town with Dad.'
'How about your brother, Robbo? Is he here'?
'He went with Mum and Dad.'
The farmer stood there for a few minutes, shifting from one foot to the other and mumbling to himself.
'Is there anything I can do for ya'? the boy asked politely. 'I know where all the tools are if you want to borrow one. Or maybe, I could take a message for Dad.'
'Well,' said the farmer uncomfortably, 'I really wanted to talk to your Dad. It's about your brother Robbo getting my daughter pregnant.'
The boy considered for a moment.
'You would have to talk to Dad about that,' he finally conceded. If it helps you any, I know that Dad charges $200 for the bull and $150 for the pig, but I really don't know how much he gets for Robbo.'

 

What is Bill's definition of safe sex?
When Hillary is out of town

How did Bill Clinton paralyze Hillary from the waist down?
He married her

Why does Hillary want to have sex with Bill Clinton first thing in the morning?
She wants to be the first lady

Why won't Hillary let her campaign staffers exercise?
She doesn't want them to "Feel The Bern".

Why is Hillary Clinton running for President?
Because it's easier than running from Law Enforcement.

Why should conservatives vote for Hillary?
Because a woman's place is in the (White) House.

Would the Clintons ever vote for Trump?
Not even if they were Hill-Billys.

Why does Hillary prefer dogs to Bill Clinton?
A dog chases his own tail

Why shouldn't Republicans worry about losing in 2016?
Apparently depression is covered by Obamacare.

​

Just for balance to Political Forum dot Com​

 

“President Trump makes public appearances several times a day,” Sarah Huckabee Sanders said. “In the course of those appearances, President Putin's remote can drain its battery very quickly.”
https://www.newyorker.com/humor

 

Every time trump has to read into a camera, I keep thinking how much he is like Keith Richards. I think he died and someone forgot to tell him.

Trump sounds like a drug addict trying to read.