We Need Something Besides Animosity- like this.

In the drive-thru line at a McDonalds a week ago, the clerk said “Your meal is paid for. The customer in front of you covered it.” I was taken by surprise with my own reaction- and very nicely so. Kind of restores your faith in your fellow man; there are still good ones out there.

Now I help friends and neighbors all the time, but this was different. As I believe very much in the “Pay it forward” philosophy, I handed her my money anyway- and said “Lets pay the tab for the person behind me.”

The more I considered my reactions and feelings, the more I liked the idea. You do something for another person, and you don't even know who they are. There is no thank you or gain, as you have driven away by the time they know of it. You don't know what their politics are, what their financial state is or even their race, nor do they know yours. Nothing to trade on either way- it's just a small unconditional and Random Act of Kindness from one human being to another.... but it has impact. I wanted others to feel the same reaction I did.

Yesterday I went through there again at a busy time, paid for my order and then handed the clerk a $100 bill. Told her to use it to pay for the meals of the people in line behind me until it was used up- and when there wasn't enough to cover the next tab, the balance was for her. I'll do it again.

We are letting the political discord damage our spirits, and our faith in one another. This is one way to offset that, totally disconnected from any motive or agenda. I highly recommend it.

 

...clerk waits till you have driven off then pockets the hundred dollars.

 

If she needed it, go ahead

 

Don't think so. I know the clerk... and her boss, who was standing beside her.

However, that risk is a reality. And the belief in it as a reason not to be kind is precisely the kind of mindset such an act changes... that is the reason for it.

 

I would love to be more charitable but there is a guy around here that holds up a sign at the stop light "down on his luck" but is most likely richer than me. Had a guy come up to me at the gas station asking for a few bucks for gas, I told him I don't have any cash but I have gas in a gas can and asked where he was parked, he said never mind. I had a guy at taco bell ask if I mind getting him a couple of tacos and I did since he didn't ask for cash for a couple of tacos. I think the next chance I get I will pick up the tab for a police officers lunch.

 

I'd go for that too!

 

My dog in my avatar had to be put to sleep, after vet bills totaling over 800$ it hurt our heart and our wallet. I fabricated him a cross from rebar with an epitaph plate with his name and dates engraved.

Went to my local machine shop to have it powder coated as I want it to outlast me. He told me 100$ to sandblast and powder coat, while it would hurt I went ahead. I went to pick it up and pull my wallet out, the fella said "No" I was like "huhh?"

He said "my sister and I spoke, we love animals and decided this is on the house" I was taken aback and overwhelmed with gratitude. I tried to tip him 20$ but he would have none of it. That hundred dollars is going towards vaccinations for our next dog who will ween any day now.

 

Does your heart good. I like to give people that feeling whenever I can. I think that just at evil breeds evil- kindness breeds kindness. Pay it forward!

 

I agree with the premise. Doing a good deed makes you feel better than all the money you have in the bank. At least that's the way it is for me.

That's why I can't understand someone voting for Trump. I you are a good-hearted person, how can you stand the vitriol that comes out of his mouth every day?

Make America kind again. That's what I read on a Biden yard sign. I fully support that message.

 

OK- fair question; straight answer.
How can I stand Trump's personality? It's simple. I'm a lot more concerned with the state of the nation than the superficiality of Trump's personalty. Personality is a short-term popularity problem. Getting the job done, making things improve, preserving the nations values are critical to the quality of life to every person- not just today, but 10-20 years and more in the future. Given that, why would I allow the superficial conflicts to dominate the fundamental needs decisions?

How can anyone who complains about those superficial faults fail to see the myriad of serious fundamental flaws the left had stooped too in response? These things are big, red character flags, not personality issues. They tell you how those people think, what their moral values will permit them to do- and that seems to have no bottom limit. I find that scary as well as extremely dangerous for the future.

You've got to look beyond the first impression, the appearances, to core values. For example- dating, finding a partner in life. First thing we see is usually physical appearance, secondly their personality front; the put-on that most people show the public to appear acceptable. Sometimes getting to know who a person really is takes years- and that is not good for the future.

So many years, ago, I met a woman who had been a Miss America contestant. Knock out looks, well dressed, very smooth conversationalist. I asked her to dinner; she accepted. Not far into that evening, she began to ask about my past marriage and shifted her focus to men in general- and she had plenty to say. All of it was ugly. Not just ugly, but vitriolic. I listened, nodded, took her home and threw her phone number in the trash. Great public image- but nothing inside I wanted to bring into my life. Toxic.

The lady I eventually married has average looks, If I had seen her first I wouldn't have given her a second thought. But I met her through a friend and talked to her on the phone and by emails, as we lived about 800 miles apart. I don't think I ever met someone so honest about themselves, and she impressed me deeply before I even saw a picture of her. The core values of this woman are everything I ever wanted. When I look at her today after 16 years of marriage, that's what I see- the beauty of what she is as a person and a woman, the beauty she has brought to my life, not the superficial.

Trump has some bad manners. While the left and MSM is trying to make people think that is all that he is and all that counts- they are lying, because they can't fight on the basis of his objectives and accomplishments. They are the people filled with vitriolic bitterness- and incapable of actual leadership. Their behavior has demonstrated this a thousand times over. I don't mean every democrat, I mean the leaders.... but the fact their followers haven't rebelled and left or changed those leaders tells us they aren't thinking for themselves, either that or they too have lost their moral compasses. Why would you buy their story when the highly visible truth shows they are the ones most lacking in fundamental character values? Why would you risk the future of your children and grandchildren by giving them power?

I value the things that count in the long run. Trump literally wants the country you live in to be great place to live. He's doing what others have lacked the guts to do- because they placed superficial approval above fundamental success. That has brought him a lot of hatred, but that is driven by the people who live in the superficial, and are unable to actually manage the reality.
I want a president who can steer the ship, not one who caters to the audience. If you find one that can do both at once- I'd probably vote for them.

 

It's so refreshing to hear you talk about doing away with animosity.

Does that mean you no longer think that Dems/liberals/progressives are evil?

 

Perhaps you should read what he said.

http://politicalforum.com/index.php...s-animosity-like-this.579925/#post-1072135645

I didn't see evil mentioned once.

This is a common problem with the left. They insert their own bull crap into an adversaries conversation and then run with it. But hey, whatever gets you through your day.

 

I guess you have not read his previous posts

 

Well said! I can only like once.

 

Not to poo poo on your parade, but weren't you really just restoring your faith in yourself and trying to feel like a good person to yourself again with Round #2? These sorts of things always strike me as a bit selfish when done in person.

 

Kindness and generosity DOES feel good for the giver. And when kindness is received, it often inspires that person to become a giver themselves. We now have a name for it - paying it forward - but it is as old as time. When we are in a position to help - we should. We shouldn't stop to question whether that person is a low life or taking advantage of a system into which we pay. We should just help. For one day, we may be down on our luck ourselves and need assistance from others.

If everyone took hold of that philosophy, we wouldn't have such injustice and imbalance in our country.

 

One has to be careful, as friend of mine's boss once told him and he repeated to me, "The hardest thing in the world to do is to help some one without destroying them".

 

Somebody always looks for a way to invert things, and that someone is usually a liberal looking for a way around the facts.
In this case- there is no reward, as the recipient won't know you, and you won't know them. The fact it is random is highly related to the effect- which is the faith that people can be considerate and helpful without a reason; it is who they are. I've always tried to be that kind of person- this is just a way to trigger the motivations in others to "Pay it forward", or to pass along good deeds. Another example is how drivers behave.
In Japan, when one driver slows to let another in, the person flashes their hazard lights a couple times- the recognized thank you in Japan for the kindness. Here, people rarely appreciate such things... and sometimes, the expression is road rage instead of understanding we're in this life together.

As a young man, I had some resentment about addressing others with the term "sir". Felt somehow I was conceding they were superior to me. If fact that was my insecurity and immaturity talking. As I grew, I came to realize that respect for others was a sign of my civility, my maturity; it had little to do with them other than it showed that I give people the fundamental courtesy of respect until they prove they don't deserve it. I give them a chance to respect themselves, and..... Pay it forward. Think of this as planting a seed, one that may grow and blossom, and pass on more seeds. Start a trend, where people are actually good to others without needing something in return.

If it's selfish to think it's a good thing to do that- I'm guilty.

 

And he was right. That mainly addresses big issues in how people think and reason; I've certainly invested a lot of time trying to help people with that, and in general discovered it's a waste of time until they are ready. . The Random Act of Kindness idea isn't really help in the sense of welfare of social programs, however. What it does is open the door in minds which may be convinced everybody has a personal motive and seeks advantage. It's just hard to place any kind of ulterior motive behind it, and that leaves only the conclusion that people can be generous in nature, if we give them a chance.

No risk of damage in this. No dependency can be developed, no obligations nor expectations, no trade of favors; totally voluntary with no strings attached. I think that's why I find it powerful.

 

Well as long as you acknowledge it is not about being selfless. They may not know you, but the woman who took the $100 knew you. The person two cars back could have been a doctor or a lawyer. An actual charity could have made sure the money went to the people who most need help. I personally would have been insulted had someone had anonymously paid for my meal for me.

 

Or they could could have been a single mom with three little ones in the back seat. Being kind to people us a good thing whether they are rich or poor. Making some one else's day is never a bad thing. Breakfast for three at mcDonalds is like 12 bucks unless you're buying for the assembly line at work.

 

Some people do have that problem; have to attach some personal aspect of themselves into everything that happens in life. They measure themselves by the perspectives of others. I'm not one of them anymore, haven't been for a very long time.