Flying on Air Force One, Pres. Obama looked at Michelle, chuckled and said, "You know, I could throw a $1000 bill out of the window right now and make somebody very happy!" Michelle shrugged her shoulders and replied, "I could throw ten $100 bills out of the window and make ten people very happy!" Hearing their exchange, the pilot of the plane said to his co-pilot,"Such big-shots back there. I could throw both of them out of the window and make 256 million people very happy!"
Barack Obama walks into a bar with a duck. The bartender asks, “Where did you get the jackass?” Barack looks puzzled and replies, “It’s a duck.” The bartender says, “I was talking to the duck.”
Barrack Obama was out jogging one morning along the parkway when he tripped, fell over the bridge railing and landed in the creek below. Before the Secret Service guys could get to him, 3 kids who were fishing pulled him out of the water. He was so grateful he offered the kids whatever they wanted. The first kid said, 'I want to go to Disney World & Barrack said, 'No problem, I'll take you there on Air Force One.' The second kid said, 'I want a new pair of Nike Air Jordan shoes. Barrack said, 'I'll get them for you and even have Michael Jordan sign them.' The third kid said, ' I want a motorized wheelchair with a built in TV and stereo headset.' Barrack was a little perplexed by this and said, 'But you don't look like you're handicapped. The kid said, 'I will be after my dad finds out I saved you from drowning.'
Moreen Dowd, who once thought of President Obama as a superhero, is now disappointed in him. Why? Because she thought he was going to be like Superman, but what she got was the Green Lantern.
Before Obama was elected president a guy walked up to the security at the White House and demanded to meet with president Obama. The security gaurd told the man that Obama was not president. The man nodded and then walked away. The next day the same thing happened, and the man nodded and then walked away. Then the same thing happened the third day. Perplexed the security gaurd asked the man why he kept coming back every day demanding to see president Obama even though he had been told repeatidly that Obama was not President. The man just smiled and said, "I just like hearing you say it".
I now know why Obama's new campaign slogan is "Forward". It's because he does not want you to look back and see how much the dollar was worth last year, or how much you were paying for a gallon of gas, nor does he want you to remember when you actually had a job. We are "progressing" don't ya know.
We paid less for gas last year than we did under Bush. The dollars was worth as much as under Bush, and it is now worth MORE than under Bush. What's your point?
Recently the Supreme Court indicated that Obamacare would be struck down and declared unconsitutional. In response and red faced, Obama said that the term "Obamacare" is incorrect, it is really "Bidencare".
Oh look, it's a progressive. You see I can always tell cause they only look forward. History is but a mystery to them. They think things like people, such as Marx, had a positive influence historically. All I can say is that you better turn things over to Romney PDQ. That way the total collapse can occur under a Republican president.
A puppet, a black guy, an illegal alien, a Muslim and a Communist walk into a bar. The Bartender asks .... "What'll it be, Mr. President?"
Obama wakes up one night, there is George Washington's ghost! He says, George, how can I help this country?" Washington replies, "Be honest with the people like I was!" Obama goes back to sleep and awakes again. This time it's Thomas Jefferson's ghost! "Tom, how can I help this country?" Jefferson says, "Love the constitution like I did!" Waking up again there is Abe Lincoln's ghost. He says, "Abe how can I help this country?" Abe replies, "Go see a play."
