Women share their abortion experiences

Abortion has a deep and profound impact on the women whose lives it touches. Just read some of these stories anonymously posted by women online:


"I had an abortion 2 weeks before my birthday in June. My partner is leaving the country in 2 weeks and is breaking up with me for his work. This is part of the reason the decision not to continue the pregnancy was made, we have been seeing eac other for 14 months but he did not want a long term relationship or a baby.

I'm now left feeling aweful, I am so unhappy. I do not know if I made the right decision and think about the baby all the time, I have nightmares about it. I get upset everytime I see a baby or hear one cry. I find it hard sometimes to be around my daughter as I feel like I don't deserve to have any children concidering what I have done. I feel very alone.

I bled for 5 weeks after the procedure and I had to be in Kenya working for 3 weeks of that on my own. Then I had a period when the bleeding stopped and after 5 days of not bleeding I am now having another period. I am also back on the pill and I cannot control my hormones. I am all over the place. Icannot control my moods and my partner now thinks this is what I am really like.

I don't know what to do? I have no one to talk to really, I want to talk to my partner but he is leaving me so feel like there is no point!

How long am I going to feel like this?

How can I make this go away?

How can I control my hormones and mood swings?

How can I forgive myself for killing my own baby?

Please can someone give me some advice , I feel like I am loosing control and I dont want to do it anymore!"


when does it get better?

"I had an abortion several years ago and feel like it still shouldn’t hurt. I was a teenager when I got pregnant 16 to be exact my boyfriend at the time was 17 we both were still in high school living with our parents and had no real means of supporting ourselves. Despite all of that we still planned to have our baby. For was a little over 11weeks we didn’t tell our families and during that time things were good. We were scared but we had each other. We started to pick put names and all. He was so attentive to me and loving even at 17 however, after we told our families all the happiness inside of us seemed to slowly drain out. My mother pushed and pushed until I decided to go through with the abortion. His parents not better. My mom literally backed me and my child’s dad into a corner. She was mean and spiteful. She said hurtful things to both of us and lied to me about him. She made me think he wasn’t there for me she was constantly telling me he didn’t call when he did and she didn’t allow him to see me, meanwhile, leaving me to feel completely alone. When I was 13 weeks pregnant I arrived at the first appointment that was made for me but I didn’t go through with it but I was strong armed to make another appointment. The end result is that I killed my baby and in one day lost a part of my soul and my boyfriend. For months I cried myself to sleep daily and faced the next day like everything was fine like I was supposed to. After all these years I still think about our baby. On my due date I find myself still feeling down even after all this time. I randomly cry about this child. II wonder what my baby would look like, sound like, who he/she would take after me or her father. I feel like I made a huge mistake and that there is no one who understands the pain except for my baby’s dad. This has caused me to still be angry with my mom and yet I have to pretend that we are ok. My husband thinks I had a miscarriage and I feel like he would never understand me or anyone for that matter. No one knows how much this hurt at the time or that it still hurts now I so miss this child and I just want to stop hurting. I want to feel whole again."

- ItStillHurts 07/27/2010


I am falling appart

"I have had a horrible situation and I would like to share it with other women. Perhaps some of you know how I feel. I have had an abortion. I didn’t want to have an abortion and I hate myself for doing it. I don’t have any kids. I have never been pregnant before. In fact, my boyfriend and I didn’t want to have children, at least not yet. He is two years younger than I am. I am 28 and he is 26. He is certainly immature and it is ok with me if he doesn’t want children. However, when I found out I was pregnant I started feeling different. Suddenly, I felt like another life is growing inside me and I wanted this child. I was told by my doctors that if I did this abortion, I would never be able to conceive again, due to other things, which I will not discuss here. I spoke to my boyfriend about this. I didn’t tell him I was definitely pregnant, but I wanted to know his attitude, so we spoke. I told him that I wanted to have that child and he wouldn’t even have to be there for be and the baby. I didn’t even ask for anything. I didn’t want to change his life and I was ready to take care of my baby on my own, without his help. I told him ”If you don’t want us, you will not even have to see us if you don’t want to. We won’t need anything from you, if you don’t want to take part in this. I just can’t sacrifice this little life inside me”. He said to me: “I don’t want this child. It would change my life, which I don’t want to happen”. I said: But you wouldn’t have to see us at all. He said; “Yes, but imagine that I already have children. Would you be with me and love me if I already had children?” I said “Of course, I would love both you and your child”. He was afraid that his future girlfriend would have a problem with him having a kid with his ex. This is monstrous. I felt like I was just a passenger in his life and like he didn’t want anything serious with me. I used to love him with all my heart, even though he never deserved it. He was acting like a little spoiled kid, ever since I knew him. According to many people, I have certain qualities that are not so easy to find in a woman. However, that wasn’t enough for him to respect me. There were men in my life that wanted to marry me and have kids with me, but I was still in love with him only. According to his statement, women who have children do not deserve to be loved. This is monstrous as well. Then we broke up. I went to have an abortion all by my self. I didn’t tell anyone because I was protecting him. I didn’t tell this even to my own mother, because I didn’t want anyone to speak badly of him. I cannot describe how I felt back then. The pain I felt in my soul was horrible. I was all alone. He didn’t even want to speak to me for two months, like I never existed. I started having nightmares and I started feeling seriously depressed. I cannot describe how vivid my dreams are. I am afraid to go to bed at night. And I sleep alone, even though I don’t have to. One day I snapped and told him what I have done. I had to tell someone, because I started feeling suicidal. I was in deep depression, and I still am. I couldn’t forgive my self for sacrificing that beautiful life that was growing inside me. I sacrificed it because of that young man who may have never been worth it. I believe he is still looking for some other girl, even though he is still with me. He washed his hands clean of this, and I am depressed and felling worse. He knows about my condition and knows that he is responsible, too, but is still acting as nothing happened. He blames me for being nervous and depressed, like he can’t understand what I am going through. I have horrible nightmares, I can’t sleep, I am alone all the time, feeling extremely bad and abandoned. I can’t even talk to anyone, don’t go out, cry a lot and spend most of my time hating myself and thinking about how good it would be if I would just vanish. The worst thing is that I have no one to talk to, and I know I need some professional help, before I harm myself. I am afraid of talking to him, because I still love him and, for some irrational reason, I don’t want him to go away. I know that there are chances he is not worth of anything, and I have no idea why I love him so much, especially after everything what he has done to me. He has already forgotten about it, as if it was nothing, as it never happened. But it did happen and one innocent life was sacrifices because of his selfishness and my own weakness. I feel like I have destroyed the life of one child, and my own life, too. I don’t know how long I will be able to carry on like this. I am going through a deep depression and I am worried about myself. I hate my self and sometimes I hate him, too. I am sorry for writing all this, but I had to tell someone. I hope you will make some sense out of this. I can’t."

--aharrison610 04/08/2011



[video=youtube;0kcn9ZjBZ64]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0kcn9ZjBZ64[/video]

 

"I'm 22 years old and just found out I am pregnant. The father already has four children from previous relationships and is also going through a divorce. Luckily, we had talked and came to the conclusion of an abortion. This whole time I had no idea I was fertile. Being as any time I tried I never got pregnant.

When I found out I was shocked. Not happy, not sad, not mad. Shocked and felt numb all over inside.

Anyways, my procedure is on Valentines Day. Which makes the matters worse for me. Lately, I've been feeling very depressed. Knowing that I'm taking the life away from something that has no idea what's going on. Who won't get a chance at life. What if this is my only chance at having a child. These are my maternal instincts talking of course. Then the logical side of me says that bringing a child into this world, into the environment I'm in just would be a bad idea. Whereas me and the father have no income, a stable home, nor are ready for another child. He already has very young children. So another would cause even more stress to the factor. But still, in my heart I want this baby so badly. But I just can't bring myself to let it into such a stressful environment. To me, it's a double edge sword. I have the baby and can't give it the best possible life. Or don't have the baby and feel guilty every day for the rest of my life."


"when I found out I was pregnant, I was numb all over. I couldn't stop crying and I didn't know how to feel. Everyone reacts differently to these situations. I understand why you are upset and it sounds like you are already having feelings of regret. This is a very tough decision to make, but you know what's best for you. It sounds like you are already pretty set in your decision. Please please please be sure to think as long and hard as you can. This is a very life-changing experience, sometimes for good, sometimes for worse. Give yourself time to really think this through. It should never be taken lightly. This is the mistake I made, I don't think I thought hard enough on it, because if I would have.. I would have kept my baby. Some people feel differently. Some people never experience any of the post abortion sadness or regret. I did though, and have been struggling with it for the past 5 months. Some days are worse than others and I am taking it one day at a time."


I chose my career, now I am struggling

"I am 24 and have known since I was around 5 that I desperately wanted children. I had a hugely strong, confident, loving mother who was an inspiration to me and I knew that when the time came I would be a natural parent. I just didn't really expect it now.

I finished university 2 years ago and, after a year and a half of doing bits of freelance work, in February I landed my dream job - working as an artistic assistant for a huge national theatre company. I adore what I do and was so passionate to go to work every day. I have always been extremely ambitious and my passion for my career is immense - second only to family in importance for me.

In May, I started seeing someone new, and things were going slowly but well - until I found out in late July that I was six weeks pregnant. I was alone with my best friend in our flat, and my first reaction was shock and delight. How could I give this up? I was overwhelmed with protective love, and began making plans for how I might afford things and etc.

When my boyfriend came over, he was lovely and supportive, but clearly not as excited as me. After a few days talking it felt as though we had different views, which was so hard because I wouldn't make a decision for someone else, but also I couldn't bring a child into the world knowing their father didn't want them - my dad told me at age 19 that he never really wanted us and was disappointed when we arrived.

So, anyway, a few days later I babysat for my friend, and when I was looking after her little boy I felt terrified more than excited. I wasn't ready for this. As I walked home through the park I remembered all those other things I want for my life. I remembered the way I felt when I got this job, and all those shows I saw in the West End that first made me realise my passion for theatre. I want so much to be successful and to achieve my career goals. And I wasn't ready to give that up. Plus, I was being forced to look at my boyfriend in a more serious light, which made me realise I don't want to spend my life with him. I know that I could have done it on my own, but I wasn't ready to face that.

So I had the abortion, and I don't regret it. I KNOW that I did the right thing, the problem is that I just can't FEEL that. It's like part of me is gone. I am so sad, all the time and the worst part is, now I can't seem to enjoy my job. I have lost my passion for it altogether. Further to that, my relationship is in complete tatters - I think I'm only staying with him because I don't want to make big life-changing decisions whilst I'm so depressed, but the stress of having to care for us both is preventing me from properly healing.

I'm so lost. I know that one day I'll feel better, because I have always been an immensely happy, confident and positive person, but I just wish I knew when."

 

giving a child up for adoptions has a huge impact on some women's lives (if one parent doesn't want to support their child, they are a deadbeat, if both parents do not want to, they are...? it's all peoples perceptions)

heck, having a baby has a huge impact on some people's lives... Andrea Yates anyone, in that case a abortion\birth control\morning after pill may have save a few children's lives


.

 

Your stories are depressing because the women involved didn't really have a choice, they felt forced to have an abortion. Here are some more enlightening stories:
http://www.fwhc.org/stories/story1.htm

 

Exactly. Perhaps if more pro-lifers believed in 'liberal' welfare programs to help pregnant women in need then perhaps these women would not have felt forced to make this choice.

 

That's the ironic thing. The number one slogan being used to defend abortion is "pro-choice". Yet when women who have actually had abortions are asked why they had it done, the most frequent response is: "I felt that I had no choice."

 

You're trying to make it appear that the reactions of a few are the reactions of all. Stop it. It's not so. Even if it were, it would not be a good cure to make sure that NO woman had a choice ever.

 

You know whats funny. I think I am the only one here who really knows first hand about abortion.

The rest of you can talk all you want...but you have no clue...what its like especially to live with its affects.

The pro-abort side asks how can anyone regret killing? It's not human, not viable and hey its the womans right to kill because its her body....so whats the big deal? That is why they believe in late term abortion on demand. These people like to lurk around abortion sites debating and championing killing....it is the food that feeds them.

Anders I love to come debate...but ya know what? This group makes me ill...sick to my stomach. I can't take it some days because its like talking to evil....Evil sees no light...light makes no difference.

Kudos to you my friend....you have a stronger stomach than I do.

 

And you talk from experience? What do you know?

I would like to know how many women you know personally who have had abortions? Have you had one?

Women have a choice today...the law affords them the right to kill. No excuses....there are none.

 

Here are some highlights of these women's stories again, for those that do not want to read to whole post...

"I do not know if I made the right decision and think about the baby all the time. I get upset everytime I see a baby or hear one cry. I feel like I don't deserve to have any children concidering what I have done. I feel very alone. How long am I going to feel like this? How can I make this go away? How can I forgive myself for killing my own baby? I feel like I am loosing control and I dont want to do it anymore!"


when does it get better?
My mother pushed and pushed until I decided to go through with the abortion. My mom literally backed me and my child’s dad into a corner. The end result is that I killed my baby and in one day lost a part of my soul. For months I cried myself to sleep daily. After all these years I still think about our baby. I wonder what my baby would look like, sound like, who he/she would take after me or her father. I feel like I made a huge mistake, I so miss this child and I just want to stop hurting. I want to feel whole again."


I am falling appart
I didn’t want to have an abortion and I hate myself for doing it. I couldn’t forgive my self for sacrificing that beautiful life that was growing inside me. I have horrible nightmares, I can’t sleep, and spend most of my time hating myself and thinking about how good it would be if I would just vanish. I feel like I have destroyed the life of one child, and my own life, too. I don’t know how long I will be able to carry on like this. I hate my self. I hope you will make some sense out of this. I can’t.


please please be sure to think as long and hard as you can. This is a very life-changing experience, sometimes for good, sometimes for worse. Give yourself time to really think this through. It should never be taken lightly. This is the mistake I made, I don't think I thought hard enough on it, because if I would have... Some people never experience any of the post abortion sadness or regret. I did though, and have been struggling with it. Some days are worse than others.


I chose my career, now I am struggling
So I had the abortion [for my career] I KNOW that I did the right thing, the problem is that I just can't FEEL that. It's like part of me is gone. I am so sad, all the time and the worst part is, now I can't seem to enjoy my job. I have lost my passion for it altogether. I'm so lost. I know that one day I'll feel better, because I have always been an immensely happy, confident and positive person, but I just wish I knew when."

churchmouse, do you care to add your experience? or do you not feel comfortable sharing it here amongst people that may berate you and, and out of a pro-abortion agenda, demean your personal experiences?

 

the common theme spoken is that a child or baby was killed. That is the sad reality. The only choice being given is for the "mom" to kill or not kill the child. The child is never given the choice to live or be murdered.

 

pro-choice supports choice, not being forced to have a child against your will OR being forced to abort a child against your will, pro-life solution would be to take away that choice and have the government decide for you

 

Why did you have your abortion churchmouse?

Was it your choice? Did someone push you into it?

Were you devoutly religious before or after the experience?

Please, if you keep bringing up the fact that you had an abortion at least give us the whole story so we can understand why you regret it so much.

Also I asked this once before and of course you never responded. churchmouse do you think that whether you had the abortion or not that you would still have the exact same children you do today and lead the life you live now?

I asked this once to my ex boyfriend's mother because she had an abortion she regretted in her college years. She was a married woman and became pregnant, she wanted to keep it but the father didn't want it and pushed her into having an abortion. She ended up leaving him after that and moving to Arizona. There she met the man of her dreams and had two sons who she adored so much. I asked her if she thought that if she had never had the abortion and had the baby instead that she would still be married and living back in Chicago?

She actually started to think deeply about that one, and her response was that she probably would not have left Chicago if she had the child and she realized she never would have met the man of her dreams and had the two sons she loved and adored so much, two sons she couldn't imagine living without.

So I ask you the same question now, did your choice to have an abortion change the course of your life? If you had not had one do you believe that your current children would still exist today?

 

The more I read about these women's actual experiences, the more I am learning that (at least in most cases), the sin of abortion does not really lay with the mother so much. Many of these young women are taken advantage of in their most vulnerable hour by unscrupulous abortion organisations. It is my sincere belief that the truly repentant, as many of these women obviously are, will not be condemned.
The little baby is taken up into God's hands; it is the woman who continues to suffer.

"The product, abortion, is skillfully marketed and sold to the woman at the crisis time in her life. She buys the product, finds it defective and wants to return it for a refund. But, it's too late."
— Carol Everett

 

So you can prove that there is a god and you can prove you know exactly what said god thinks and how he will judge each individual human being?

 

Women have been having abortions for thousands of years. For most of that time there were no "abortion organisations" at all, much less "unscrupulous" ones. You have no respect for women at all if you can't understand that women know their own minds and will make decisions on their own. Of course women are influenced by the people they care about and those whose opinions they respect, but that doesn't mean that the choices they make aren't their own.

 

Funny, I have never seen this "marketing" of abortion services.

 

This sign is just creepy when you think about what's really behind it.



Orlando Women’s Clinic Advertises $50 Coupons for Discount Sunday Abortions
http://www.lifenews.com/2012/06/25/abortion-clinic-mocks-god-offers-sunday-discounts/

This was an advertisement aired on TV in the UK:

[video=youtube;lSH6wLDoE1w]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lSH6wLDoE1w[/video]

Maybe they should ban abortion advertising the same way they ban cigarette advertising, after all, both can kill.

 

The video is not promoting abortion, it is telling women who are pregnant unexpectedly that they have options.

 

This sign is sponsored by Johnson & Johnson, "With text4baby, you’ll get critical health and safety tips timed to your baby’s age up until baby’s first birthday."

Do you think a $50 discount coupon would convince a woman (who was not even considering having an abortion) to get one?

This is an ad about women's options, including birth. Do you think young girls should not even be informed about their legal options? I'll bet you're against sex education in schools, too.

 

And before that often "taken advantage of" by unscrupulous men

 

No, that's like saying a vampire can feed itself with its own blood. Their food is the life energy of those who are foolish enough to engage them angrily and self-righteously.

However malevolent they are, they weren't born that way. They hated someone for whatever reason, and the evil that insinuated itself into them in that moment now hopes to put your light out by the same process.

 

Here are some more "abortion experiences" this time from women who have had late term abortions
On November 11, 2005, I elected to have [a] CVS test. . . . Then, the test results came in. . . . We knew chromosome 14 was incompatible with life, and chromosome 22 could mean Cat Eye Syndrome. Both my husband and I wanted the baby very much, and neither one of us was willing to terminate the pregnancy on a “maybe.” . . .

I had the amnio on 12/26/05, and the results came in on Jan. 13, 2006. It confirmed without doubt – she had Cat Eye Syndrome tetrasomy in every cell of her body. The last 3 sonograms showed . . . our baby’s kidneys were beginning to malfunction. . . .We made this decision because we loved our daughter so much. We didn’t want her to suffer the definite and the untold problems she was sure to endure, if she even made it. We made the best decision we could with the information we
had. We fought for her. We wanted her. But we didn’t want to condem[n] her to [a] life of agony.
http://www.rhrealitycheck.org/blog/...bortions-facts-stories-and-how-you-can-help-0

[QUOTE] was about 17 weeks pregnant at the time. . . .[T]hey scheduled us for our Level II ultrasound a few weeks early so they could look in more detail at the baby. . . . A few days [after the ultrasound], we received the news that would change our lives forever. Our son was infected with CMV (cytomegalovirus). This was the worst possible scenario (of the possibilities we were given). . . . Although I have always been pro-choice, I had winced at the thought of late-term abortions or "partial birth” abortions, thinking that it was just inhumane or irresponsible. Now I know differently. In my case, we were not able to confirm our diagnosis until 19 or 20 weeks gestation. I terminated at 22 weeks. . . . I was completely heartbroken. . . . [/QUOTE]
http://www.rhrealitycheck.org/blog/...bortions-facts-stories-and-how-you-can-help-0


Late term abortions most commonly occur on WANTED pregnancies - they are a tragedy for all concerned

 

You know I have made it clear that I don't oppose euthanesia on the severely retarded, much less abortion on a genetically defective baby.
Stop trying to scare everyone into believing pro-lifers want to force the woman to carry a defective baby. Most of us see these situations for what they are— mercy killings.
When it is not okay to mercy kill your child is when the baby is normal and health and the supposed justificcation is "to give the baby a better life". I hope that is clear.
This thread isn't about abortions on retarded babies with severe genetic disorders.

 

There are man pro lifers who want to force a woman to have a severely disabled baby and go broke trying to care for it.