I think I was date-raped last weekend, what should I do?

just making a point... lol

 

So much of the angst I see on this thread could be prevented by on simple thing...

Don't (*)(*)(*)(*) people you aren't planning on having kids with, and don't get plowed and expect other people to understand you won't want to have sex....tomorrow.

 

but to suggest this to a womyn feminazi is UNHEARD OF!!!11

I've always maintained that, if you choose to put yourself into that kind of condition, that does not alliviate you from responsible.

a wife beater can't say "I shouldn't be held accountable for hitting my wife because I was drunk and my decision making abilities were impaired. I would never have done that had I been sober"

a drunk driver can't say "I shouldn't be held accountable for drinking and driving because I was drunk and my decision making abilities were impaired. I would never have done that had I been sober"

a guy can't say "I shouldn't be held accountable for sleeping with that girl because I was drunk and my decision making abilities were impaired. I would never have done that had I been sober" and then claim daterape....


so why should a woman, who wouldn't get a free pass for poor decision making for drunk driving, be allowed to claim date-rape because alcohol impaired her judgement?


I will say it again, because someone will try and spin it... Note that I said, when you CHOOSE to put yourself into that position. I do believe in date-rape charges for guys who slip women drugs so they pass out or forget. Or work to get the girl so drunk she passes out. That is rape. Including the ability for a girl to simply claim date-rape because she regretted the fact her prince charming while drunk, was a POS in the morning is ridiculous.

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but to suggest this to a womyn feminazi is UNHEARD OF!!!11

I've always maintained that, if you choose to put yourself into that kind of condition, that does not alliviate you from responsible.

a wife beater can't say "I shouldn't be held accountable for hitting my wife because I was drunk and my decision making abilities were impaired. I would never have done that had I been sober"

a drunk driver can't say "I shouldn't be held accountable for drinking and driving because I was drunk and my decision making abilities were impaired. I would never have done that had I been sober"

a guy can't say "I shouldn't be held accountable for sleeping with that girl because I was drunk and my decision making abilities were impaired. I would never have done that had I been sober" and then claim daterape....


so why should a woman, who wouldn't get a free pass for poor decision making for drunk driving, be allowed to claim date-rape because alcohol impaired her judgement?


I will say it again, because someone will try and spin it... Note that I said, when you CHOOSE to put yourself into that position. I do believe in date-rape charges for guys who slip women drugs so they pass out or forget. Or work to get the girl so drunk she passes out. That is rape. Including the ability for a girl to simply claim date-rape because she regretted the fact her prince charming while drunk, was a POS in the morning is ridiculous.

 

if you were a woman, you'd have been dateraped...

 

if you got so drunk and cant remember what happened next after the kissing how do you know it wasn't consensual sex?
regret the next morning doesn't constitute rape

if you have no proof that it wasn't consensual and on your own admission you don't remember. you need to leave it as a life lesson not to get so drunk you cant remember your own words or actions

 

sorry, but as a woman.... consent isn't needed.... if a woman is drunk, their judgement is impaired and since the other person knew I was drunk (because we had to stop twice so I could puke), I will stick to the fact that I was raped

 

You should have puked in his mouth. That is if you really wanted him to stop.

 

had he been drinking? how do you know you didn't take advantage of his impaired state? did you pass out and if so was that before or after the sex. you say you cant remember so how do you know?

I will repeat what I've already said

regret the next morning doesn't constitute rape

 

I was drinking.... according to my texts, "I'm in bed, but you don't need to drive, I'll come get you...."


So I'm not 100% sure, but it was clear I was in no condition to drive....

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but I was clearly in no condition to make a decision. When I was sober, I made the decision NOT to pursue sexual relations.... but when I was drunk, I allowed it. Alcohol clearly affected me, and I think that obvious state of drunk was taken advantage of.

 

was he drinking is what I asked did you take advantage of his impaired state?
how do we or you know you didn't strip down naked in your drunken state and scream give it to me? would you still conceder it rape if he did just that and gave it to you?

 

I can't tell you if the person who had sex with me had been drinking. The only thing I could tell you for sure was they had to get out of bed to come get me.


Sober enough to drive I'm assuming

 

and I will ask again
how do we or you know you didn't strip down naked in your drunken state and scream give it to me? would you still conceder it rape if he did just that and gave it to you?

 

doesn't matter.... I was drunk.... that's all that matters for girls who regret the next morning, what they did the previous night.



I made a decision influenced by alcohol, and my state was well known, to both the slime that picked me up, who I previously shot down, and to those at the party

 

laughable at best, stupidity at its worse, that is what your comment is.

 

ask your friend why he raped you...

 

wrong take responsibility of your actions and if your not capable doing that drunk don't drink
do men need to start giving women breathalyzers and have women sign a consent form? does it then need to be done in the presence of a lawyer and be notarized

if you take your case in front of a judge he should charge you with false accusations being drunk doesn't excuse you from your own actions

 

I'm afraid you are wrong;

An area of confusion on the date rape topic is intoxication. Bottom line, if a girl is intoxicated she cannot consent to sex and you could be charged with rape. It does not matter whether you knew she was intoxicated, it doesn’t matter if you were intoxicated too, all that matters is that she was not in a state of mind to consent and therefore it is rape. If you get a girl drunk or high and then “get together” with her you have committed a sexual assault. Again, it doesn’t matter if you are drunk or high as well. Your diminished abilities do not negate your responsibilities. - http://teenadvice.about.com/od/daterape/a/daterapeguysfyi_2.htm

The fact remains that a person who is drunk is deemed incapable of giving consent, this is judged against the question of would the person give consent if they were of "sound mind", if not then it is rape or sexual assault if no actually penetration occurs. This applies for both men and women.

 

What if both are drunk? Can a drunk man give consent?

 

Yes of course he can, which I suspect you well know but that of course would not fit with your agenda.

 

Despite the fact that it seems not to filter through your dense skull, neither a man or a woman when drunk can give consent to sexually activity .. if one or the other claims rape the following morning then the situation leading to the sexual intercourse would be investigated, if it was found that one of the parties was in a more coherent state than the other they can and probably would be charged with rape. The fact that your OP states that a condom was used implies that at least one of the parties involved were of a 'sound mind' to think to use one . .which ever that was is the one guilty of rape, be it the man or the woman. This so called inconsistency you bleat about is nothing more than an illusion you create in your own mind for your own purpose.

 

You don't seem to be listening at all.

If you decided to claim rape then your inability to give consent while not of 'sound mind' would be reason enough for it to be investigated, the fact that have already decided NOT to claim rape does not change the legal facts of the matter.

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Which is absolutely no different to what you can do.

 

You did nothing wrong apart from trying to turn your experience into some kind of women get a better deal and understanding than men topic .. it's BS, if you feel violated then either report it or get help from the numerous groups who offer advice etc to women & men who are the victims of rape but are to scared to go to the police about it.

 

now that a few others have joined in....I'll fess up... I'm a male. The story is still true..... I had a blind date, wasn't interested in date #2, but Jack Daniels and not having much success at the sausage fest that was the party I was at the next night, I started drunk texting girls in my phone.... you know, dangle the bait, see which one bites.


Well, she bit, got up out of bed to drive my drunk butt home. I was planning to stay at my brother's house had she not come, so I wasn't driving anywhere. But she came, and I was horny.


seems funny that had the genders been reversed, people cry my situation was date rape. Yet, when I point out I'm a guy that too drunk to make a decision I would later regret....I'm just called an alcoholic.


FWIW - this happened year and a half ago... and no, I didn't press charges, because I, too, feel if you chose to get your self drunk, and then call someone else up.... it's not date-rape, even if they turn out to be a cow, or ugly, or dorky...


I got a little turnabout 2 months later. She got plastered and called me up to give her a ride home. I obliged, and got oral for my troubles.


6 months after that, when I had become involved with my current fiance, I got another "I'm drunk" texts.... I politely declined, and explained why... and we haven't spoke since.

 

Absolute and utter rubbish, any person who is deemed incapable via drink, drugs, age or mental ability is deemed incapable of giving consent, regardless of whether they accent to sex while incapable.

 

If the man is drunk to the point of being incapable of giving consent then he will not be able to have sex anyway, look up brewer’s droop.