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Tasteless Humor II The Second One.

Discussion in 'Humor & Satire' started by Moi621, Feb 21, 2019.

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  1. Liberty Monkey

    Liberty Monkey Well-Known Member

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    They appreciate the sentiment anyway but wasn't my house or even my parents.

    Top tip if you're going to burn a house to the ground with a cig make sure it's not yours and rented :)
     
    Last edited: Mar 17, 2019
    Liberty Monkey, Mar 17, 2019
    #176
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  2. cerberus

    cerberus Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    I've been thinking about trying Thai cuisine, so I went onto Youtube to find out more; it seems they use all parts of animals including their genitalia. :eekeyes: :puke::puke:Think I'll stick with curry! :nod:
     
    cerberus, Mar 17, 2019
    #177
  3. Derideo_Te

    Derideo_Te Well-Known Member

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    In other words you feel better just not knowing that they put the genitalia in the curry?
     
    Derideo_Te, Mar 17, 2019
    #178
  4. yasureoktoo

    yasureoktoo Banned

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    Kid rushes in the house.

    Hey dad, can I have 5 dollars for a Guinea Pig.


    Here's 10 son, get yourself a nice Irish girl.
     
    Last edited: Mar 17, 2019
    yasureoktoo, Mar 17, 2019
    #179
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  5. xwsmithx

    xwsmithx Well-Known Member

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    I like it. I was dating an older woman one year when I had Thanksgiving with a friend whose parents were Serbian immigrants, and all their family was there, too. When my friend told them I was dating an older woman, they tried to encourage me to go to Serbia and find myself a young woman to marry. I said, "So you're saying a young woman from the Old World is better than an old woman from the New World?" They laughed.
     
    xwsmithx, Mar 17, 2019
    #180
  6. Liberty Monkey

    Liberty Monkey Well-Known Member

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    Mr Muscle, loves the jobs you hate.
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    He's Polish then.
     
    Liberty Monkey, Mar 17, 2019
    #181
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  7. yasureoktoo

    yasureoktoo Banned

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    Do you know why the Polish don't have a lot of kids.


    They usually wait till the swelling goes down.
     
    yasureoktoo, Mar 17, 2019
    #182
  8. Liberty Monkey

    Liberty Monkey Well-Known Member

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    Simply put a % sign after your age to see how dead you are...
     
    Liberty Monkey, Mar 17, 2019
    #183
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  9. Liberty Monkey

    Liberty Monkey Well-Known Member

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    I'm worried something might be wrong with my testicles. One seems bigger than the others.
     
    Liberty Monkey, Mar 17, 2019
    #184
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  10. Liberty Monkey

    Liberty Monkey Well-Known Member

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    I love taking my blind daughter out for a drive.
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    Every time I hit a speed bump, I tell her it was a dog.
     
    Liberty Monkey, Mar 17, 2019
    #185
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  11. Liberty Monkey

    Liberty Monkey Well-Known Member

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    I'll never forget what my Grandfather said just before he died.
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    "Are you still holding that ladder?"
     
    Liberty Monkey, Mar 17, 2019
    #186
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  12. Liberty Monkey

    Liberty Monkey Well-Known Member

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    I couldn't believe it when my grandmother died on her 100th birthday.
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    We were only halfway through the bumps.
     
    Liberty Monkey, Mar 17, 2019
    #187
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  13. yasureoktoo

    yasureoktoo Banned

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    My grandfather died in a ww2 concentration camp.

    He fell off a guard tower.
     
    yasureoktoo, Mar 17, 2019
    #188
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  14. Moi621

    Moi621 Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    Was he a guard?
     
    Moi621, Mar 17, 2019
    #189
  15. yasureoktoo

    yasureoktoo Banned

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    It's a joke.
     
    yasureoktoo, Mar 17, 2019
    #190
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  16. Moi621

    Moi621 Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    Duh Uh :)
    and a gotchya too
    So very tasteless.
    That's why "Moi" initiated the original and the second one.



    (now gimmie a like for a gotchya in "real time") :lol:
     
    Moi621, Mar 17, 2019
    #191
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  17. Liberty Monkey

    Liberty Monkey Well-Known Member

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    [​IMG]
     
    Liberty Monkey, Mar 18, 2019
    #192
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  18. Liberty Monkey

    Liberty Monkey Well-Known Member

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    Zero hour contracts are no new thing, there's a bloke that lives on my street been on one for years.
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    He's 49 and been signing on since he left school.
     
    Liberty Monkey, Mar 18, 2019
    #193
  19. Liberty Monkey

    Liberty Monkey Well-Known Member

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    Liberty Monkey, Mar 18, 2019
    #194
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  20. Liberty Monkey

    Liberty Monkey Well-Known Member

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    I just said "No comment" all the way through the police interview.
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    I didn't get the job.
     
    Liberty Monkey, Mar 18, 2019
    #195
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  21. xwsmithx

    xwsmithx Well-Known Member

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    Yesterday I was sitting at a red light when a car full of young Muslim men yelling and chanting anti-American slogans pulled up next to me. When the light turned green, they pulled out into the intersection only to be creamed by a truck trying to run the yellow light, killing them all instantly. I sat there in my car for a long time, thinking, "That could have been me." So bright and early this morning, I went out and applied for a job as a truck driver.
     
    xwsmithx, Mar 18, 2019
    #196
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  22. Nonnie

    Nonnie Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    No comment.
     
    Nonnie, Mar 18, 2019
    #197
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  23. yasureoktoo

    yasureoktoo Banned

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    So a guy walks into a hotel and sees Trump there.
    Mr Trump, what an honor, whatcha doing.

    I'm planning ww3 Trump says.

    What are you going to do the man says.

    Trump says, I'm going to kill 100 million Muslims, and a blond with big tits.

    Why you going to kill a blond with big tits he says.

    Trump leans over to the bartender and says, see, nobody cares about 100 million Muslims.
     
    yasureoktoo, Mar 18, 2019
    #198
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  24. Liberty Monkey

    Liberty Monkey Well-Known Member

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    Last edited: Mar 18, 2019
    Liberty Monkey, Mar 18, 2019
    #199
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  25. Liberty Monkey

    Liberty Monkey Well-Known Member

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    I've had surstromming! There are not words to describe it, all I can say wise cats.

    Google videos to watch people vomit when opening a can this is not faked, the gas mask is not overkill lol.
     
    Last edited: Mar 18, 2019
    Liberty Monkey, Mar 18, 2019
    #200
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