Dismiss Notice
Thanks for being a member of our community. Please donate toward site expenses if you can.

Tasteless Humor

Discussion in 'Humor & Satire' started by Moi621, Jul 19, 2014.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
Page 70 of 149
  1. HereWeGoAgain

    HereWeGoAgain Banned

    Joined:
    Nov 11, 2016
    Messages:
    27,942
    Likes Received:
    19,980
    Trophy Points:
    113
    The jury just delivered a new note to the judge in the Manafort trial. It read: Does anything we do matter? Trump will just pardon him no matter what crimes he has committed.
     
    Last edited: Aug 17, 2018
    HereWeGoAgain, Aug 17, 2018
    #1726
    Sallyally likes this.
  2. Liberty Monkey

    Liberty Monkey Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Apr 11, 2018
    Messages:
    10,856
    Likes Received:
    16,450
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Gender:
    Female
    Liberty Monkey, Aug 18, 2018
    #1727
    Sallyally likes this.
  3. Liberty Monkey

    Liberty Monkey Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Apr 11, 2018
    Messages:
    10,856
    Likes Received:
    16,450
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Gender:
    Female
    Liberty Monkey, Aug 18, 2018
    #1728
    Sallyally and Nonnie like this.
  4. Liberty Monkey

    Liberty Monkey Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Apr 11, 2018
    Messages:
    10,856
    Likes Received:
    16,450
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Gender:
    Female
    Liberty Monkey, Aug 18, 2018
    #1729
    Sallyally likes this.
  5. Liberty Monkey

    Liberty Monkey Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Apr 11, 2018
    Messages:
    10,856
    Likes Received:
    16,450
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Gender:
    Female
     
    Liberty Monkey, Aug 18, 2018
    #1730
    Sallyally likes this.
  6. Sallyally

    Sallyally Well-Known Member Donor

    Joined:
    Mar 12, 2017
    Messages:
    15,884
    Likes Received:
    28,345
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Gender:
    Female
    A group of Alabama friends went deer hunting and paired off in twos for the day.
    That night, one of the hunters returned alone, staggering under the weight of an eight-point buck.
    "Where's Henry?" the others asked.
    "Henry had a stroke of some kind. He's a couple of miles back up the trail," the successful hunter replied.
    "You left Henry laying out there and carried the deer back?" they inquired.
    "A tough call," nodded the hunter.
    "But I figured no one is going to steal Henry!"
     
    Sallyally, Aug 18, 2018
    #1731
    Liberty Monkey likes this.
  7. Liberty Monkey

    Liberty Monkey Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Apr 11, 2018
    Messages:
    10,856
    Likes Received:
    16,450
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Gender:
    Female
     
    Liberty Monkey, Aug 18, 2018
    #1732
  8. Sallyally

    Sallyally Well-Known Member Donor

    Joined:
    Mar 12, 2017
    Messages:
    15,884
    Likes Received:
    28,345
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Gender:
    Female
    "No one could do your job. Maybe some teeth in a glass?" Very funny.
     
    Sallyally, Aug 18, 2018
    #1733
    Liberty Monkey likes this.
  9. Sallyally

    Sallyally Well-Known Member Donor

    Joined:
    Mar 12, 2017
    Messages:
    15,884
    Likes Received:
    28,345
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Gender:
    Female
    Some retired deputy sheriffs went to a retreat in the mountains. To save money, they decided to sleep two to a room. No one wanted to room with Daryl because he snored so badly. They decided it wasn't fair to make one of them stay with him the whole time, so they voted to take turns.
    The first deputy slept with Daryl and comes to breakfast the next morning with his hair a mess and his eyes all bloodshot. They said, "Man, what happened to you?"
    He said, "Daryl snored so loudly, I just sat up and watched him all night."
    The next night it was a different deputy's turn. In the morning, same thing--hair all standing up, eyes all blood-shot. They said, "Man, what happened to you? You look awful!"
    He said, "Man, that Daryl shakes the roof. I watched him all night."
    The third night was Frank's turn. Frank was a big burly ex-football player; a man's man. The next morning he came to breakfast bright eyed and bushy tailed. "Good morning."
    They couldn't believe it! They said, "Man, what happened?"
    He said, "Well, we got ready for bed. I went and tucked Daryl into bed and kissed him good night. He sat up and watched me all night long
     
    Sallyally, Aug 18, 2018
    #1734
    Derideo_Te, Nonnie and Liberty Monkey like this.
  10. Liberty Monkey

    Liberty Monkey Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Apr 11, 2018
    Messages:
    10,856
    Likes Received:
    16,450
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Gender:
    Female
     
    Liberty Monkey, Aug 18, 2018
    #1735
    Sallyally likes this.
  11. Gatewood

    Gatewood Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Aug 31, 2013
    Messages:
    47,624
    Likes Received:
    48,666
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Yep and the resulting anguished howls of lynch mob mentality leftists and their RINO allies will reverberate across this land with a kicking-beat that one can both hum and dance to. Sweet!
     
    Gatewood, Aug 18, 2018
    #1736
  12. Nonnie

    Nonnie Well-Known Member Past Donor

    Joined:
    Dec 25, 2017
    Messages:
    8,399
    Likes Received:
    7,247
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Gender:
    Male
    Did you know that there are more aeroplanes in the sea than there are submarines in the sky!!
     
    Nonnie, Aug 18, 2018
    #1737
    Sallyally likes this.
  13. Nonnie

    Nonnie Well-Known Member Past Donor

    Joined:
    Dec 25, 2017
    Messages:
    8,399
    Likes Received:
    7,247
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Gender:
    Male
    I've watched most of Jimmy Carr's put-me-downs. I always like the ones about Rhod Gilbert and Rhod's reaction.

    Henning Wehn is funny, must be one of the very few Germans with a sense of humour. When he was in dictionary corner, he said, "I was going to count sheep to get to sleep but with the mud, I couldn't be bothered to fill in the Health & Safety forms".
     
    Last edited: Aug 18, 2018
    Nonnie, Aug 18, 2018
    #1738
    Sallyally likes this.
  14. Nonnie

    Nonnie Well-Known Member Past Donor

    Joined:
    Dec 25, 2017
    Messages:
    8,399
    Likes Received:
    7,247
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Gender:
    Male
    What's Princess Diana and a mobile phone got in common?
    .
    .
    .
    They both go dead in a tunnel.
     
    Nonnie, Aug 18, 2018
    #1739
    Liberty Monkey and Sallyally like this.
  15. Robert

    Robert Well-Known Member Past Donor

    Joined:
    Aug 16, 2014
    Messages:
    68,085
    Likes Received:
    17,138
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Gender:
    Male
    Who wore it better?

    [​IMG]
     
    Robert, Aug 18, 2018
    #1740
    Liberty Monkey likes this.
  16. Robert

    Robert Well-Known Member Past Donor

    Joined:
    Aug 16, 2014
    Messages:
    68,085
    Likes Received:
    17,138
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Gender:
    Male
    This is good solid comedy.

     
    Robert, Aug 18, 2018
    #1741
    Bisquit, Sallyally, politicalcenter and 1 other person like this.
  17. Nonnie

    Nonnie Well-Known Member Past Donor

    Joined:
    Dec 25, 2017
    Messages:
    8,399
    Likes Received:
    7,247
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Gender:
    Male
    Do you think they called the 'Saw' films saw so that people would say:
    "Did you see Saw?"
    "Yeah I saw Saw."
    "Did you see Saw 2?"
    "I saw Saw 2 too"
    "Did you see Saw 3?"
    "No but I saw Saw 4"
    "Why would you see Saw 4 before you saw Saw 3 for?"
     
    Nonnie, Aug 18, 2018
    #1742
    Diablo, cerberus, Rathelon and 1 other person like this.
  18. Liberty Monkey

    Liberty Monkey Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Apr 11, 2018
    Messages:
    10,856
    Likes Received:
    16,450
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Gender:
    Female
    I'm looking forward to the remake set in Blackpool
    .
    .
    .
    SeaSaw
     
    Liberty Monkey, Aug 19, 2018
    #1743
    Sallyally likes this.
  19. Rathelon

    Rathelon Active Member

    Joined:
    Aug 17, 2018
    Messages:
    107
    Likes Received:
    33
    Trophy Points:
    28
    Gender:
    Male
    kevin-malone-offsite.jpg
    You could have stopped after "Did you see Saw?" But, I get it - you were stoned.
     
    Last edited: Aug 19, 2018
    Rathelon, Aug 19, 2018
    #1744
  20. Nonnie

    Nonnie Well-Known Member Past Donor

    Joined:
    Dec 25, 2017
    Messages:
    8,399
    Likes Received:
    7,247
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Gender:
    Male
    It's an old joke that did the Facebook rounds years ago.
     
    Nonnie, Aug 19, 2018
    #1745
  21. Rathelon

    Rathelon Active Member

    Joined:
    Aug 17, 2018
    Messages:
    107
    Likes Received:
    33
    Trophy Points:
    28
    Gender:
    Male
    Oh, that's your excuse...what were we talking about?
     
    Rathelon, Aug 19, 2018
    #1746
  22. Sallyally

    Sallyally Well-Known Member Donor

    Joined:
    Mar 12, 2017
    Messages:
    15,884
    Likes Received:
    28,345
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Gender:
    Female
    A married couple was on holiday in Pakistan they were touring around the marketplace looking at the goods and such, when they passed a small sandal shop.
    From the inside they head a Pakistani accent say, "you foreigners come in. Come in my humble shop." so the married couple walked in.
    The Pakistani man said to them, "I have some special sandals I think you'd be interested in. They make you wild at sex like a great dessert camel"
    Well, the wife was really interested in buying the sandals after what the man had claimed, but her husband felt he really didn't need them, being a sex hero he as.
    The husband, "how could sandals make you into a sex freak?"
    The Pakistani man replied, why don't you see for yourself?"
    Well , the husband after much badgering from his wife, finally conceded to try them on.
    As soon as he slipped then onto this feet, he got this wild look in his eyes, something his wife hadn't seen in years-- raw sexual power.
    In a blink of an eye the husband rushed of too the Pakistani man threw him on the table and started tearing at the guy's pants.
    All the time the Pakistani man was screaming, "YOU HAVE THEM ON THE WRONG FEET YOU HAVE THEM ON THE WRONG FEET"
     
    Sallyally, Aug 20, 2018
    #1747
    Derideo_Te, Max Rockatansky, Nonnie and 2 others like this.
  23. Liberty Monkey

    Liberty Monkey Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Apr 11, 2018
    Messages:
    10,856
    Likes Received:
    16,450
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Gender:
    Female
    My cat wants to get in on this Political correctness scene.

    #FleeToo
     
    Liberty Monkey, Aug 20, 2018
    #1748
    Sallyally likes this.
  24. cerberus

    cerberus Well-Known Member Past Donor

    Joined:
    Sep 17, 2015
    Messages:
    25,530
    Likes Received:
    5,363
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Hung Chow calls in to work and says, "Hey, boss I not come work today, I really sick. I got headache, stomach ache and my legs hurt. I not come work." The boss says, "You know Hung Chow, I really need you today. When I feel like this I go to my wife and tell her give me sex. Makes everything better and I can go to work. You try." Two hours later Hung Chow calls again: "Boss, I do what you say and I feel great. I be at work soon. You got nice house."
     
    cerberus, Aug 20, 2018
    #1749
    Diablo, Nonnie, Sallyally and 1 other person like this.
  25. Nonnie

    Nonnie Well-Known Member Past Donor

    Joined:
    Dec 25, 2017
    Messages:
    8,399
    Likes Received:
    7,247
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Gender:
    Male
    What do you call a China man with one leg?
    .
    .
    Ti-Won Shoo
     
    Nonnie, Aug 20, 2018
    #1750
    Sallyally and Liberty Monkey like this.
Page 70 of 149
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.

Share This Page