How Not to React when Your Son Tells You that He's Gay

Yeah, when anyone in your family hits you, that's when you know your family is a bunch of psychos and it's time to leave for your own safety. If you read any of the follow up articles and videos on this topic. You would know that this was indeed an intervention on the part of the family. I posted links earlier in the thread with additional info from the kid's aunt.

 

You know, I can be sympathetic to a little tough love towards a young adult out staying their welcome with mom and dad. But when the reason is the youngsters sexuality, and not that he does nothing but scratch his nuts and play video games all day long, I am no longer sympathetic. Someone who can disown their own children because of that is a hateful, dispicable, nasty person unworthy of respect.

 

There's no mention he does anything but scratch his nuts and play video games all day long since he still lives with granny. Disowning grown children rarely lasts. Things are said in the heat of the moment and it sounded like granny slapped him in the heat of the moment.

Domestic discord happens in families all the time. It only makes the front page when it's caused by a gay man trying to cram his gayness down his Christian family's throats. He may have succeeded in embarrassing his folks, but he's the one without a family. I wouldn't call that a win.

 

I'll believe what I heard with my own ears before follow-up articles. His grandmother called the meeting to tell him to get out. That's not an intervention. That's granny having her say.

20 is not a kid. He's a grown man and could have prevented this whole scene by moving out from under his family's roof.

 

Moving out on your own at 20 is often financially impossible in this age. How out of touch are you?

And to yguy, what about queerness is a perversion? And comparing us to The Party just because we want the same rights as you? Ludicrous.

I'd also like to know why Smartmouth thinks all of us here are gay men. Some of us may be gay women, or bisexual, or transgender.

 

It really is a pointless battle, the people you are trying to discus with have absolutely no interest in anything that may impose on their own little bubble world .. I know I've tried.

They see anything that steps outside of what they consider normal to be wrong, despite the fact that normal is something that changes with societies acceptance or not. Slavery was considered normal and yet here we are now where slavery is considered one of the most heinous things there is.

I have given scientific research into homosexuality based on how the brain can be affected by changes in hormones during it's development and as such produce a 'mental' gender that is the direct opposite of the physical gender, and how that hormone changes can span across a spectrum from the quintessential butch man to the highly effeminate man (same applies to females as well) .. but it falls upon stony ground, their ideology is baked so hard into them that no amount of evidence will ever take root.

I am content to know that these type of people are a dying breed and that the younger generation are not so programmed, so take heart and let them spew their ignorance for in the future they will be nothing more than footnotes in history.

 

Too funny. You made it way too easy. All had to do was quote the post above.

 

It's called having a life. I don't spend every waking moment in the forum, waiting for you to post something that you think I must respond to immediately. I actually go much longer stretches from time to time without even visiting the forum.

 

Says the guy who thinks there's actually a "gay mafia".

 

Says the guy who is part of the gay mafia.

That's how they work.

 

No, I am not part of any "gay mafia". Where on earth did you get such a ridiculous idea? Because I dare to speak my mind?

I don't have to take anyone's BS. Refusing to do so doesn't make me a member of the "gay mafia". It makes me a human being with a spine.

 

oh no guise he knows about us

better call the don and tell him to take a hit out

But seriously, where do you get an idea that ludicrous?

 

Isn't it funny how that works? Let people abuse you and you're a wimp. Stand up for yourself against that abuse and you're a bully.

There is no winning with some people.

Another news video here:

http://www.11alive.com/story/news/local/kennesaw/2014/08/29/georgia-gay-intervention-video/14829517/

 

You have no idea the irony of your post.

I have nothing more to say to you.

 

You have no idea of the irony of the term "gay mafia". It's pretty silly.

And that's exactly what he was illustrating with his post.

 

It's the only way to maintain your sanity some times. I mean literally. What's that they say about insanity??? Repeating the same thing over and over and over again and expect a different outcome? That pretty much describes most conversations on the forum, although at some point I think we become well aware that no different outcome is to be expected.

 

Well, you'll just have to convince that there is no such thing instead of just insulting and berating me for something I've come to fully believe.

Because that is part of how the gay mafia works. By ridicule, harassment, and insulting people all to hell and back, and the tag teaming to wear a person down.

I will not be bullied, I will not be intimidated into changing my mind nor shutting up, UNTIL learn to stop your hypocrisy.

You don't want people doing this to you yet you believe it's okay for you to do it to other people.

That's hypocrisy.

Name calling and stereotyping others who disagree with you is what the gay mafia is all about.

It's exactly what you don't want done to you.

 

You seem to think that not putting up with bigotry is itself a form of bigotry.

It isn't. If an opinion is bigoted and people treat you like a bigot, you have no right to cry about it. If you want to change things try putting up a decent argument instead of being upset because people think you're hateful.

 

Really? So first of all, let's start to get to the root of the issue. What exactly do you disagree with regarding gay people?

1. Do you think we deserve to be treated equally under the law?

2. Do you think we are what we are, or do you think we can be cured?

3. Do you think people should be able to discriminate against us because of what we are?

4. Do you think parents should disown their gay children with absolutely no consequences, especially if they are minors? I might remind you that 40% of all homeless youth are gay, were rejected by their families, and are on the street. I've seen this and had to deal with it.

5. Do you think people should get a free pass to discriminate against us based on religion alone?

6. Lastly, do you think we should just shut up and accept any and all discrimination and abuse thrown our way as just a difference of opinion, and say or do nothing about it?

 

Wow- you are truly amazing. Yeah, and granny decided to bust his lip to get what she wanted. What a great granny. Now, ignore things all you want, but here's another for you I posted earlier. Oh, I know, He just wants attention and is self-absorbed. He has no right to expect his family to love him, or at the very least, refrain from hitting him.

Like I said before, you are a really piece of work, lady.

http://www.11alive.com/story/news/lo...ideo/14829517/

 

1. Yes I do. I do NOT support discrimination.

2. I don't have an answer for that. I haven't seen any real facts or scientific studies to make a conclusion, and there's just way too much emotions involved on both sides of the issue. I'm going to have to go with let the individual decide for themselves what they want to do with their life. I am not going to try to change them. But neither will I support it either.

3. i have conflicting opinions on that. on one hand there is the right of association. on the other discrimination is wrong. I don't believe in forcing people to accept people and beliefs if they don't want it.

4. No I do not. But this is another area I'm weak on.

5. That's a vague statement and is often misleading. I believe in freedom of religion, and to force Churches who don't support is just another form of discrimination as well. Why can't you just go to a church or an organization that will marry you? These guys are coming out of the woodwork now.

6. No, I think all forms of oppression should be fought, but there is a right way and a wrong way to do it. I am a very strong believe in the Constitution, and I believe that rights must be applied evenly to everyone or they cease to be rights and instead become special privileges and double standards, and I absolutely hate those to a tee, regardless of what my own personal prejudices are.

I am also in favor of keeping the government out of people's lives and unobtrusive as possible. In fact many of my beliefs come from classical liberalism:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Classical_liberalism

Harassing people to no end and telling them to shut up just because they disagree with you and vandalizing their property is not the right way to do so and ONLY creates more resentment.

Protesting in the streets in a valid way to do it, but please leave out the disgusting stuff or I won't care what the point of the protest is.

Writing you congressman is the right way to do it.

Petitions and not supporting someone is the right way to do it.

Advertising in the media is another way of doing it.

But imposing yourself on to other people, vandalizing them, and trying to shut people up is just asinine.

Those are thug tactics that have been used on you.and by my way of thinking, even if there is a different justification for these actions, if you use the same tactics as thugs I just can not see any difference. Those are thug tactics that ALL tyrannical governments use.

 

I'm sticking to these answers because they are what matter here.

So, let's go forward.

1. Good to hear.

2. Though no definitive answer yet, science is very much leaning to to opinion that we do not choose to be gay or straight. And from my personal experience, there was no choice.

3. Being gay is not a belief. It's a trait just like I have green eyes is a trait.

4. You mean, you actually doubt your opinion on this? Well, here's some evidence for you:

http://williamsinstitute.law.ucla.edu/press/americas-shame-40-of-homeless-youth-are-lgbt-kids/

That's a major problem, and one this thread topic addresses.

5. No churches are being forced to marry gay people. They don't even have to marry interracial couples or anyone else for that matter.

6. OK then, well we're fighting it on all fronts. It should not be socially acceptable to do what this family did to their child. It should not be socially acceptable to try to deny us equal protection under the law.

 

Well here's some articles for you to consider.

It is happening in Denmark right now:

http://eaglerising.com/6712/government-forces-church-perform-gay-marriage/

And there's this:

http://eaglerising.com/6712/government-forces-church-perform-gay-marriage/

http://blog.speakupmovement.org/chu...me-sex-marriage-bill-is-a-threat-to-churches/

http://www.lifesitenews.com/news/i-...want-gay-couple-suing-church-for-refusing-wed

And I do agree that it is a shame that families disown their children. But, at the risk of sounding contradictory, it would also be a shame to force parents to accept their children as well.

If it were me I would create an organization that would help these children, and help them form their own community where they could be self supporting and have an education to go into society.

Because that's what outcasts do, they form their own societies.

But I don't have the money to do that.

There are things like old military bases that are up for sale and what I'd like to do is to buy them and rehabilitate them and form new tight knit communities that are about overcoming our petty difference and learning to live with each other, respecting and taking care of each other.

There's just too much bigotry and intolerance in America. I'd love to see it go the way of the dodo, but until people learn to stop politicizing things, then that bigotry and intolerance will just increase until it all boils over into a huge conflict. It may not happen in my lifetime, but I do see it happening some time down the road.

And not to advertise or attention whore. Those kinds of things just smack of egotism and egotism makes people feel like they've been marginalized.

 

Denmark is not the US. The US has very different rules.

And I cannot believe you think it's OK to throw a minor child out on the street. I can't believe you think it's an option for children to be ghettoized.

With that, we're done here. There is nothing more to discuss, as we have a very fundamental disagreement on what is acceptable and what is not. Parents should never discard a minor child for something beyond their control and put them on the street. Those kids are helpless and have nothing.

BTW, we do have organizations to help these kids, but the resources are limited, and we can only do so much.

 

Yes, we do.

You believe it's okay to impose your morality on to other people, I do not.

And no, I am not imposing. You are the clear aggressor here.