Ive not been in the dating game for a long time. Im in a loving relationship that i enjoy being in. But i saw a documentary recently, it was interviewing females asking the question, "would you date an average guy?" These women were not ugly neither were they stunningly beautiful or particularly intresting, they were mearly average themselves. Whats suprising they all seemed to look down on the average guy, boring, not interesting, nothing special, or nothing going for him, were many of the answers. It seems a large majority of women would not date and look down on theur male equivalent. I know its not all down to looks, perspnality or whatever but a large portion is. What i find intresting is that how it effects society. With the average males looked over, it leaves womem to gravitate towards the most superior (in a dating sence) males. This leaves the average guy slighly bitter in some cases often looked over by women, a sence of insecurity, mabye even resentment towards women. On the flip side the women who does for the males with an abundance of options is taken advantage of not taken serious in a lor of cases. The guy just messes them about and uses them for sex because he has an abundance of females to choose from. This often makes the women to resent males as they have treated he badly like a jerk would. After being burnt many times sd she ages, hdr looks fade she finally finds a nice guy to settle down with. But i guess both parties are damaged goods by now. Im nothing against this, its natural selection and has been essential to our survival. Plus it is motivation a driving force to push people the best they cam be. Its just an observation and possibly the cause of what a lot of people are messed up. I think the main reason for this is because the world is getting smaller, there were less options back in the day. Not a woman cannot walk down the street without a horny guy eyeing her up, being it on constantly, and on the dating apps a huge list of willing male suites to choose from. Its a circle the more times a dude is rejected the lower he drops his standards and the more desperate he gets. I believe its a male problem and they are to blame. Guys are simply not picky enough. Whats everyones thoughts on this?
Im from the uk. Tbh growing up id meet girls in clubs and from friends of friends kinda the old fashion way i guess now. Picking up women was never really a problem. It seems things have changed now and dating apps have opened up the market and women are becoming too fussy online and in real life. Like why go for a normal guy when you have a line of better males cued up online. Like i have friends that are pretty good looking guys but they say the have zero chance of finding a potential partner these days as they are "not good enough ". I guess they resent women now and basically hook up with unattractive females ans just use them for sex.
It would be like asking a man if you would go out with an unattractive woman. He could say no. It wo t have much choice. Women can say they will only go out with a man who they look up to but what one woman considers a man looking up to another woman might see him is looking down on. It’s all about seeing things through different eyes
They resent women probably because they’re not good enough for most. Believe me women do not have to use not good enough men for sex they can get sex easy enough from worthy men
But the irony is that give and take a little the population is 50/50 split men and women. If the average guys are not good enough for the average girls it just leaves the above average guys ****ing as many average women they can and leaves a lot of old washed up single women later in life. The desperate man that takes her in resenrs the fact he had to wait and was second choice. The woman resents she had to settle for a average chump. Dosent make for a fulfilling relationship. I just think girls and guys have it rough these days and the old fashion way was best. There is literally nothing that can change this or make it fair. Its not right or wrong, just life. Its just an observation and intresting to look at.
I understand im not blaming women. You are attracted to who youre attracted to. It just interesting how the situation makes a huge portion of our population both men and womens existence miserable . I have a feeling more guys than you think or that would admit settle with someone they are not attracted to out of pure desperation.
I learnt about two groups the other day. Incels (involuntarily celibate) average and below avarage guy that women reject completely. They basically give up all hope and end up becoming restful and twisted men. They litrally hate women and have even carried out mass murders because of the resentmant they harbour. Huge amounts of them are committing suicide. Another is MGTOW (Men go there own way). These guys simply reject women , their attitude is i dont need a woman. They simple exclude them from their life and want nothing to do with the enemy. Apart from using them for sex. I see this im my friends, they are fed up with women, dont want them in their life, well only for sex. A few years ago hearing about things like this would be shocking but these days it seems to normal.
I'm too old to have any first hand experience with dating apps, but it seems to me that it creates a near perfect market. A woman can flip through pictures of about all of the guys in her area she's physically attractive to in no time. So since those are pic instead of personality intensive, naturally she's only going to narrow her field to the best looking guys. So it's women all over town basically going after more or less the same hot guys. So it sounds like the majority using those devices to meet someone is going to be disappointed.
I believe in a modern society this transfers over to real life expectations. Where everyone is using dating apps, why settle for that average dude you just met in real if you can jump online and find someone better. Males are reacting by becoming more pathetic, desperate and some cases giving up. Women are becoming more picky and are getting used up and spat out by the hot guys playing the field.
The idea of being 'in love' used to be viewed as a mental dissorder. Folks primarily got married as a means to mutually make their lives easier by sharing all the various responsibilities of raising a family. Now it seems like folks are looking for emotional codependence- they are unhappy and they think someone else can make them happy. They start a family, then break it up because they're still unhappy. Instead of realizing they need to make themself happy, they just go from relationship to relationship looking for happiness everywhere except for where it can actually be found- within. They want the emotional high of a new relationship to last forever... and it cant.
This is a big problem in Japan and China right now. The women are very picky and only want to go for the top 20% of guys, or will be alone because they can't find what they want.
Thanks for mansplaining we know what we want..and it’s not insecure men who make statements like this
Women used to settle for their equal or better. Men settled for eaualor less...now women are getting better and there aren’t as many men to choose from, they don’t make looks their criterion. But not to worry, more women are happy not married and have great relationships with women friends
y'all over analizing this, and that is 'the turn off'... people are attracted to those that are self confident, looks are secondary, and if you're constantly questioning "why?", than you lack self confidence...
Interesting thoughts Fwiw i think men have their own sets of delusions (especially when they are younger) I think people are often not clear to themselve about their values. Just as a trivial example... a shared sense of humor turns out to be very important to me, although in my youth i might have overlooked this for other more exciting details. It turns out that excitement inevitably fades while a sense of humor never gets old.
How are women getting better? Women havent changed, the society around them has. An average woman today is not a better human than say a woman 50 years ago. Humanity hasent evolved in that short of time. Same women, same men thats not changed. Plus this sums you up pretty well. Women or not better, men and women both hold the same value. Anyone who belived in equality could see this. Hmm lots of studies have been carried out finding that peoples happiness and well being has taken a nose dive recently. It is Ovbiously down to a number of factors and influences but on average peoples lives are not peaches and roses today.
welp, now that you've gone down that road, society has lost touch ever since they stopped being a family unit... each sibling moving away as quickly as possible, weakening the family unit both spiritually & financially... back in the day, families built wealth by staying together, under the same roof, expanding the home until it became a castle/fortress, and learning from oneanother , caring, nurturing each other... the family unit has dwindled by design of the architechs and further devolved into me me me... ummmm, where was i, oh yes, a proverb... 'if it smells like cologne leave it alone, if it smells like fish eat all you wish'
