Tasteless Humor II The Second One.

stole it to share with a superficial cab-sav lover...

 

Frightening isn’t it. I think it’s probably applicable to Merlot, Shiraz and possibly Port.

 

why whine when you could wine instead...

 

Election day

 

Mein Chat?

 

Where's Nonnie? I wonder I'm sure he has some sage words of advice on todays election.

 

Is this a comparison with panel beating?

 

Where is Nonnie? ah looked em up "banned at member's request" ...what does that mean? Did another member ask for him to be banned or did he ban himself?

 

He asked for his account to be closed.

 

ahhh.. his wife must of seen his post! LOL

 

No, not that.

 

Wife told me to take the spider out instead of killing it....
So i did. We had a few drinks, we talked. I totally misjudged spiders. This guy was cool. He wants to be a web developer.

 

Caught a skunk in a live trap once.. I had to let it go too. Long story of how I did that, and a prequel story to that (such as, just how and why it was I captured a skunk in a live trap)

 

Haha. I suppose getting skunked was inevitable, or did you hypnotise it?

 

A little walk with dad.
So I was walking down the street with my dad the other day, and two youngsters, possbile who did not even hit the 15 yet, walked infront of us. And they were talking loudly and one asked the other "Why do some old dudes walk like they´ve **** them self?"

My dad promptly answered "97% its lower back pain, 3% is a misjudged fart."

 

Nonnie's gone?

Damn

 

Bless that skunk! No I did not get sprayed,

drug it out of the garage by hooking the cage with a rake, tied to a long rope and then maneuvering it out between two trucks.. then wifey said I had to feed it because I had to leave it overnight.
the next morning I managed to bump the cage over and open from the shielding of one of the trucks.

 

Yup.. he's missed.

 

Classic Rocky and Bullwinkle pun
On a December trip to Frostbite Falls, Minnesota, Ferdinand Feghoot was summoned to the local college, Wossamotta U. by Inspector Fenwick, the Chief of Police.

There he was confronted with an appalling scene. Bullwinkle, the town's leading citizen, had been smashed flatter than a kippered herring by a falling safe.

"It's a common enough means of death for cartoon characters," Fenwick opined. "Every year, we lose five or six citizens to falling safes. But this time, it was no accident. This time, it's murder!"

He showed Feghoot the ingenious deadfall trap rigged to rain financial ruin on an unsuspecting victim. Bullwinkle's antlers were still entangled in the tripwire. Grasped tightly in one hand was a small statue of a Hindu god.

The dead quadruped's best friend, Rocky the flying squirrel had been with Bullwinkle at the time of his death, but when questioned by Feghoot, the distraught rodent said all he could remember was seeing a rabbi fleeing the scene upon a pogo stick.

Fenwick immediately issued an APB for the rabbi.

"You're wasting your time, Fenwick," said Feghoot grimly, as he stood from his examination of the body. "The rabbi has been framed. When you find him, he will tell you of some elaborate ruse that induced him to be on a pogo stick at this time and place."

"How do you know that, Feghoot?" asked the Inspector.

"This is the work of the Christmas Killer," Feghoot declared. "I have been on the trail of this fiend for years, and I fear that we might never catch him. Every December, he arranges one of these grisly messages."

"Look! Didn't you notice the smile on the victim's face? The corners of his mouth have been propped up... by these!" He displayed two toothpicks he had taken from Bullwinkle's mouth.

"I still don't see how you know the murderer is the Christmas Killer," said Fenwick.

"Isn't it obvious?" Feghoot asked. "Wee Vishnu, a merry crushed moose, and a hoppy Jew near."

 

In Australia, a man is driving with his wife and small child.
A policeman pulls the man over on suspicion of the man being drunk and gives him a breathalyzer test. “See,” the policeman says, “you are drunk.” The man protests that the breathalyzer must be broken and invites the policeman to test his wife. She also registers as drunk. Exasperated, the man invites the policeman to test his child. When the child registers drunk as well, the policeman shrugs and says, “Yes, perhaps it is broken,” and sends them on their way. Out of earshot the man tells his wife, “See, I told you it wouldn’t hurt to give the kid a beer.”

 

Is Andrew Wang An Asian Christopher Walken?

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GOT CHEEKBONES?

 

Is It True . . .

Greta Thunberg
has a Dragon Tattoo

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And I don't mean

GoT style! ​

Dragon Tattoo.