Tasteless Humor 3, Lord How Many More?

I see someone has hit the ground running.
Sally will be along to welcome you, she's the nice one here. Oddly enough she also is responsible for the most tasteless stories.

 

I hope it's not Sand paper Sally.

 

Aw shucks.

 

Truly Tasteless.

 

So we're friends then?

 

Yep. I lean left. That might be a bit awkward at times.

 

Perhaps I can adjust your gyroscopic molecular leveling beacon? If not then you'll love this:

 

Which of the three is wonderful and the other two are what?

 

You're pulling out all the stops because I said Sally made the most tasteless posts aren't you? This is definitely a tasteless posts top ten candidate.

 

Oh my gosh! A pedestal for my tomato planter and twine to tie up the vines! How cool!

 

Well, it's a good thing that nobody has ever claimed that masks protect the wearer. It's fine if you don't understand the psychics of the disease v mask, but you shouldn't advertise that fact.

 

How long did it take for you to go from political expert to a viral expert?

 

It’s ok to kiss a nun
As long as you don’t get into the habit.

 

One night a guy takes his girlfriend home. As they are about to kiss each other goodnight at the front door, the guy starts feeling a little frisky. With an air of confidence, he leans with his hand against the wall and smiling, he says to her: “Honey, would you take me upstairs?”
Horrified, she replies: “Are you mad? My parents will see us!”
“Oh come on! Who’s gonna see us at this hour?” he asks, grinning at her.
“No, please. Can you imagine if we get caught?”
“Oh come on! There’s nobody around, they’re all sleeping!”
“No way. It’s just too risky!”
“Oh please, please…. I love you so much!”
“No, no, and no. I love you too, but I just can’t!”
“Oh yes you can. Please?”
“No, no. I just can’t!”
“I’m begging you… “

Out of the blue, the light on the stairs goes on, and the girl’s older sister shows up in her pyjamas, hair dishevelled, and in a sleepy voice, she says: “Dad says to go ahead and take him upstairs if you want, or I can do it, or if need be, mum says she can come down herself and do it, but for God’s sake, tell him to take his hand off the intercom!”