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Tasteless Humor 3, Lord How Many More?

Discussion in 'Humor & Satire' started by Moi621, Apr 14, 2020.

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  1. James California

    James California Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    " Humor is in the eye of the beholder "

    468kh8.jpg
    ~•~
    main-qimg-0b91fc2ded623c0f71ed9d6ccc55c734-lq.jpeg
    " I never trusted anyone without a sense of humor. In fact, the difficult people in life seem to be born without a humor gene. "
    ​
     
    James California, Jun 30, 2022
    #2576
  2. popscott

    popscott Well-Known Member Donor

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    [​IMG]
     
    popscott, Jun 30, 2022
    #2577
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  3. popscott

    popscott Well-Known Member Donor

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    [​IMG]
     
    popscott, Jun 30, 2022
    #2578
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  4. Sallyally

    Sallyally Well-Known Member Donor

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    A Russian wife turned to her husband and asked, "What's this special
    military operation our glorious leader keeps talking about?"

    Her husband replied, "It's a proxy war between Russia and NATO."
    "Oh, right. How's it going?"
    "Well," he replied, "so far we've lost 24,000 soldiers, 2,000 tanks,
    200 aircraft, numerous helicopters, loads of armoured vehicles and
    artillery pieces. Not forgetting our Black Sea flag ship along with
    other naval pieces"

    "Wow! What about NATO?"
    "They haven't turned up yet."
     
    Sallyally, Jul 1, 2022
    #2579
    Roadvirus, Bowerbird, Imnotreallyhere and 3 others like this.
  5. HereWeGoAgain

    HereWeGoAgain Banned

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    Because she has shown herself to be brave and a true patriot, because she is a young 26 yo who stood up before Congress and told the truth even while being threatened by the trump thug mob, I am officially proposing to Cassidy Hutchinson - marriage, or just a meaningful relationship, or even just a few hot nights are fine with me. I am personally in your debt.

    And in a similar vein, for her honesty and bravery and willingness to go where no other republicans would dare go and take on trump, I am offering Liz Cheney a night with Cassidy and me.
     
    HereWeGoAgain, Jul 1, 2022
    #2580
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  6. Sallyally

    Sallyally Well-Known Member Donor

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    How could they resist such a tempting offer?
     
    Sallyally, Jul 2, 2022
    #2581
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  7. 19Crib

    19Crib Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    CB1EC37A-AA3A-4287-B636-07FD68449FB2.jpeg
     
    19Crib, Jul 2, 2022
    #2582
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  8. Nonnie

    Nonnie Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    So Paddy, everytime I'm round at yours, I open the fridge and there's always an empty milk bottle in there. What the feck is that all about?

    Well Murphy, it's just in case someone fancies a black coffee.
     
    Nonnie, Jul 2, 2022
    #2583
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  9. Montegriffo

    Montegriffo Well-Known Member

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    [​IMG]
     
    Montegriffo, Jul 4, 2022
    #2584
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  10. Nonnie

    Nonnie Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    Nonnie, Jul 6, 2022
    #2585
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  11. HereWeGoAgain

    HereWeGoAgain Banned

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    HereWeGoAgain, Jul 6, 2022
    #2586
    Sallyally and Nonnie like this.
  12. HereWeGoAgain

    HereWeGoAgain Banned

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    I loved blowing stuff up as much as anyone, however....

    https://www.cpsc.gov/s3fs-public/2020-Fireworks-Annual-Report.pdf

    When I was probably about 11 or 12, I managed to get a brick of fire crackers from a friend. At some point I proceeded to cut a bunch of them open with an X-acto Knife and make a big pile of gunpowder. I just wanted to torch off a big pile of gun powder. The moment I threw a match in the pile and it started to deflagrate [burst into flames] a gust of wind hit and blew the burning gun powder into my face and eyes, I was out on the sidewalk a short distance from my front yard. I was able to open one eye enough to make my way to a water spigot and start flushing my eyes. And thankfully my sight started to return after a few minutes. I must have had what they call dazzle - a condition that temporarily overloads the optic nerves.

    Scared the crap out of me!!! For a few minutes I thought I might be blind.

    And no joke about the gunfire. A lot of people in Highland Park hesitated because they thought the gunfire was firecrackers. I've heard this from other mass-shooting victims. It doesn't have to be the 4th.
     
    Last edited: Jul 6, 2022
    HereWeGoAgain, Jul 6, 2022
    #2587
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  13. Nonnie

    Nonnie Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    We did the same as kids and were mighty disappointed there wasn't an explosion, just a plume of smoke and that was it.
     
    Nonnie, Jul 6, 2022
    #2588
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  14. Nonnie

    Nonnie Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    Two birds, one stone - 4th July celebration combined with abortion -

    Unborn babies celebrate first Independence Day since 1972.
     
    Nonnie, Jul 6, 2022
    #2589
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  15. HereWeGoAgain

    HereWeGoAgain Banned

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    Well yeah, if they had a brain. LOL!

    And no fireworks allowed in there.
     
    Last edited: Jul 6, 2022
    HereWeGoAgain, Jul 6, 2022
    #2590
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  16. Nonnie

    Nonnie Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    Son: Why is my sister called Teresa?
    Dad: Coz your mum loves Easter - it's an anagram
    Son: Thanks dad
    Dad: No problem Alan
     
    Nonnie, Jul 6, 2022
    #2591
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  17. Nonnie

    Nonnie Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    I was driving home yesterday when I came up to one of those half barrier level crossings.The red lights were flashing and the barriers were on their way down so I pulled up sharply.
    Suddenly this car full of Democrats pulled out and tried to beat the lights and barriers. They got half way across when a large fully laden goods train hit them, the car disintegrated and all the occupants were killed instantly.
    I sat there open mouthed and thought "Jesus, that could have easily been me"

    So this morning I've sent off my train drivers application form.
     
    Nonnie, Jul 6, 2022
    #2592
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  18. Nonnie

    Nonnie Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    How do you milk sheep?

    Release another iPhone
     
    Nonnie, Jul 6, 2022
    #2593
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  19. Nonnie

    Nonnie Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    I've noticed a lot of Americans joining the British political forums...

    But I suppose it's normal for them to join late after all the hard work has been done

    :dual:
     
    Last edited: Jul 6, 2022
    Nonnie, Jul 6, 2022
    #2594
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  20. Nonnie

    Nonnie Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    If online bullying has taught us anything it's that some kids would rather kill themselves than lose a bit of weight.
     
    Nonnie, Jul 6, 2022
    #2595
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  21. Sallyally

    Sallyally Well-Known Member Donor

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    Mobile phones are the biggest marketing trick ever.
     
    Sallyally, Jul 6, 2022
    #2596
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  22. Sallyally

    Sallyally Well-Known Member Donor

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    Uneasy silence!
     
    Sallyally, Jul 6, 2022
    #2597
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  23. Nonnie

    Nonnie Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    Yup, I always buy my phone outright, this time it was a Nokia 8 for £250. My phone tariff costs £5 per month and I don't change my phone until they die.
     
    Nonnie, Jul 6, 2022
    #2598
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  24. Sallyally

    Sallyally Well-Known Member Donor

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    The only reason I bought a mobile, is that it made getting into shops easier (Scanning the QR code).
    Otherwise I didn’t use it. A $50 prepay.
     
    Sallyally, Jul 6, 2022
    #2599
  25. Bowerbird

    Bowerbird Well-Known Member

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    Why do I get the feeling this originated in Ukraine? Lols!
     
    Bowerbird, Jul 6, 2022
    #2600
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