Tasteless Humor II The Second One.

I went with big boobs, big ass, good looking.. and she's a hairdresser.. definitely in the zone "not to marry" , fortunately, it turns out she can cook and clean too, plus as her looks fade, she's been drifting into the "marriage zone" on the hot vs. crazy graph. Still crazier than a runover dog, complains about not having any help, and when I tell her I have some young new renters that can help out with painting and yard work, she blows a gasket!

 

I know who that young lady was.......

 

Ab

And cooled mashed potatoes with butter when you're watching porn feels just like ...
Was I speaking out loud? Shiiiite!

 

Thread win I announce my retirement from professional comedy it's time to become a politician instead

 

Seems some skills can be transferable for that.

 

Didn't you mean "confessional"?

 

Have I Got News For You? Watch out.

 

What happens on the forums stays on the forums

 

Aged 107

 

That's why Julian Assange got banned.

 

If I could bring any program back I would bring Spitting Image back and take it to the states.

I would not be kind to Trump either lol because Spitting Image everyone was free game!

But can you imagine the AOC and Hillary puppets? I'd make AOC a child and Hillary has to be Satan

 

Would you believe this was before he was POTUS?
Guess he evicted the wrong muppet.

Donald Grump.

 

Spitting Image humour level is above American's comprehension

 

That's a very low bar though

 

Depends if they can wave a chicken in the air.

 

Talking about chickens

 

Jet airliner is minutes from crashing, a 21 year old virgin doesn’t want to die a virgin. “Excuse me!! Is there anyone on the plane that can make me FEEL like a woman before I die?”
Young strapping lad walks up to her unbuttoning his shirt,hands it to her and says “iron this”

 

I now have an ear Worm!

 

Got to No. 1. Erm, a tad embarrassing.

 

A store has opened in New York to sell husbands!

A store that sells husbands has just opened in New York City, where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates.

“You may visit the store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the attributes of the men increase as the shopper ascends the flights.

There is, however, a catch: You may choose any man from a particular floor, or you may choose to go up a floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building!”

So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband, and she looks at the signs as she goes up the floors.

On the first floor the sign on the door reads: “Floor 1 – These men have jobs.”

The second floor sign reads: “Floor 2 – These men have jobs and love kids.”

The third floor sign reads: “Floor 3 – These men have jobs, love kids, and are extremely good looking.”

“Wow,” she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.

She goes to the fourth floor and the sign reads: “Floor 4 – These men have jobs, love kids, are drop-dead good looking and help with the housework.”

“Oh, mercy me!” she exclaims, “I can hardly stand it!”

Still, she goes to the fifth floor, where the sign reads: “Floor 5 – These men have jobs, love kids, are drop-dead gorgeous, help with the housework, and have a strong romantic streak.”

She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor anyway. There, the sign reads:

“Floor 6 – You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor.
This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please.

Thank you for visiting at the Husband Store.”

 

Yep, know how you feel-this was also popular.

 

The Hot / Crazy Matrix as explained by a police training officer ...